Free Louise Rennison_Georgia Nicolson 05 by Away Laughing on a Fast Camel Page B

pages and already I want to slit my wrists. Anyway, where was I before I so rudely interrupted myself? Oh yes, so because Hawkeye has windows open all over the school, we could get in through the Science block window.
    Once we got in, we lit a few Bunsen burners for warmth. Voley is still here in his little pickling jar forever waving at us. I said, “Hello, Voley, my dad fell down a badger hole.”
    I thought he would like to know the news from the forest, even though he has been pickled for years.
    Rosie was trying to toast a bit of banana over the naked flame of a Bunsen burner. I sensed a burning-down-the-Science-block situation but I didn’t want to spoil her girlish high spirits by saying anything. Also I had just got myself all snuggled up in some science overalls. I decided to tell Rosie about Mark Big Gob.
    She listened and said, “He is clearly a knob head, but you knew that. Forget it; we have more important things to think about. There is a lot of work to do at school, and this is a very important term.”
    I looked at her in amazement. “Rosie, please tell me you are not talking about exams and it’s not the way you run the race but the winning that counts.”
    She gave me the famous cross-eyed look. “Do not be a twit and a fool and a prat. I’m talking about our plans for Mr. Attwood’s leaving do.”
    hockey
    I did actually cheer up in games. There is nothing like socking a bit of concrete about a pitch and smacking shins with my hockey stick to get the juices flowing. Additionally, Nauseating P. Green was goalie, which is a guaranteed laugh. It is funny enough seeing her lumbering around in huge pads picking the ball out of the back of the net but the pièce de résistance was when she fell over on her back and couldn’t get up. Like a big tortoise waving her shin pads about. She finally managed to get up after about ten minutes and just as she was on her feet a ball whizzed in and hit her in the tummy and down she went again.
    Cruel, but funny.
    jas’s place
5:00 p.m.
    Jas and Hunky are going on this wilderness thing this weekend, so Jas made me go up to her room and look at the stuff she is taking with her. Good grief, the things I do for friendship.
    Her room is ludicrously tidy, all her soft toys arranged in size order. Very sad. I said that as I looked around. “Very very sad.”
    But the Wild Woman of the Forest was too busy rooting around in her wardrobe. She was all enthusiastic.
    â€œLook at these. They are my special army-issue waterproof trousers; even if I like, accidentally fell into a swamp I would still have dry legs.”
    I looked at the hideous yellow things. “Are you sure those are not just massive incontinence knickers, Jas?”
    She was just rambling on as if I wasn’t there, which actually in my mind I wasn’t.
    On and on, completely gone off to Jas land.
    â€œYou should get yourself a hobby, Gee, and then you wouldn’t end up throwing yourself at boys and losing your dignity.”
    How annoying is she?
    Vair vair and thrice vair annoying.
    6:00 p.m.
    After about a million years of looking at really dull bits of Wellington boot, etc., I slouched off home.
    I am so sick of walking. Walk, walk, walk that’s all I ever do. I’ll wear my legs out at this rate. To pass the time I did what I used to do as a kid. I pretended to be riding a horse. I galloped along tossing myhead about and saying “Giddyup” and flicking a pretend whip. The bit between the bottom of Jas’s road and my house was very quiet, so I really let my horse (Dark Star) have his head. I flicked at his haunches with my whip and felt the wind on my face and the freedom of the hills. “Yes, yes, ride on my beauty!” I pulled Dark Star to a halt so that we could cross the road, which was just as well, as across the road was Cad of the Universe. Dave the Laugh. Oh brilliant. Thank you, God. My head was practically