conceded to my sensitivity but insisted I run in the 300-yard relays (with Melis, Mickey McNeal, Kazarakis)âwe had the best 300-yard relay in the state and even beat St. Johnâs Prep older collegians in the Boston finalsâSo every afternoon Iâd have to run the bloody 300 usually in a relay race, just to the clock, against another little kid twenty yards behind me and no footballing on the banksâSometimes girls would come and watch their boyfriends in track practice, Maggieâd never have dreamed it she was so gloomy and lost in herself.
Pretty soon itâll be time for the 600âthe 1000âbroad jumpâshot putâthen home we goâfor supperâthen the phoneâand Maggieâs voice. Aftersupper Lowell talking to meââCan I come tonight?â
âI told you Wednesday.â
âThatâs too far awayââ
âYouâre cray-zee .â
âas lonely glooms fall enfolding all the warm organic rooftops of living Lowellâ
14
After the last six oâclock shot put, the ball in the fingers delicately against the neck cradled, the kick, the hop, the twist of waist, the push up and out of the ball high and farâthis was funâIâd go in to showers and re-dress to again for the third time in my busy crazy high day stride Moody Street determined, young, and wildâa mile home. In winter darkness, the Baghdad Arabian keenblue deepness of the piercing lovely January winterâs duskâit used to tear my heart out, one stabbing soft star was in the middle of the magicalest blue, throbbing like loveâI saw Maggieâs black hair in this nightâIn the shelves of Orion her eye shades, borrowed, gleamed a dark and proud vellum somber power brooding rich bracelets of the moon rose from our snow, and surrounded the mystery. Smoke whipped from clean chimneys of Lowell. Now at Worthen, Prince and other old milltown streets as my feet shot me past I saw the redbrick faded into something cold and roseâunspeechedâthroat-chokingâMy fatherâs ghost in a gray felt hat walked the dirty snowsââ Ti Jean tâen rappelle quand Papa travailla pour le Citizen? â pour LâEtoile? â (Remember when your father worked for the Citizen, for the Star?)âI hoped my fatherâd be home that week endâI wished he could give me advice for Maggieâand in the grim mill alleys of ink blue and lost solstice rose he moseyed shades aside moaning my name, big, shadowy, lostâI shot past the Library now brown-windowed for scholars of the winter eve, the reading room bums, the childrenâs library roundshelved fairytaled and sweetâthe profound bloodred bricks of the old Episcopalian church, the brown lawn, the jag of snow, the sign announcing speechesâThen the Royal Theater, crazy movies, Ken Maynard, Bob Steele, the French Canadian tenements seen up side streets, the gay winter Northâremnant Christmas bulbsâThen Ah the bridge, the sigh of waters, the soothe big roar low wind coming in from Chelmsford, from Dracut, from the northâthe orange iron implacable dusk skies pinpointing the steeples, and roofs in a still gloom, the iron arbrous brows of old hills far offâeverything engraved and glided upon the eve and that frozen still. . . . My shoes clomped the bridge boards. My nose snuffled. A long and tiresome day and far from finished.
I passed the Textile Lunch windows, saw the bent fisty eaters through steam panes, and turned smartly into my gloomy rank doorwayâ736 Moody Streetâdankâup four flights in eternity. In.
â Bon, Ti Jean est arrivez! â my mother said.
â Bon! â my father said, he was home, there was his face peeking around the kitchen door with a big Oriental grinâAt table, my motherâs loaded it with food, steamings, goodies, heâs been feasting for an hourâI rush up and kiss his sad rough
Ambrielle Kirk, Amber Ella Monroe