Free Seaweed Under Water by Stanley Evans

flared and his mouth tightened. He had been wearing glasses. Now he took them off and held an earpiece between his teeth while he reached into a drawer and brought out a silver cigarette case and a crystal ashtray, which he put on the desk. When he laid his glasses down, I noticed that the plastic earpiece was indented with tooth marks. Owens opened the silver box, took out a cigarette and lit it with a silver Ronson lighter.
    By the time he’d finished doing all that, his composure had returned. He put his glasses back on, blinked his eyes and said, “Sorry, I don’t smoke much any more, nasty habit. Anyway, as I was saying. I thought Janey and I were set. I was mistaken. We got along nicely for a few weeks. Janey drank too much. She woke up most mornings with terrific hangovers, and she had a wicked temper. Our relationship wasn’t one of equals. Except in matters involving money, she was the dominant partner. Given a different age and a different chromosome, Janey would have been another Alexander the Great, Napoleon.”
    â€œBut not another Warren Buffett, I take it?”
    â€œNo. Maybe another Anna Nicole Smith. Jane went through money like it was water.”
    Owens stubbed his cigarette out and immediately lit a second. After thinking for a moment he went on, “Our condo deal went sour. We’d paid too much for it, as it happens, and that didn’t help matters between Janey and me. Janey’s drinking got worse, her morning hangovers became more or less chronic. Even so, I still found her irresistible. What put the kibosh on everything, though, was that I advised her to invest in a company I was involved with—Manson Electronics. Fred Manson, the president, was a long-time client and friend. He had a great track record. Cut a long story short, Janey lost money on that deal too. Money she didn’t have at the time. You may have heard about it. Manson Electronics went bankrupt in short order. We both lost—I’d poured my own money into it. After a screaming match, Janey moved out of my house and went straight to her lawyer. Sued me to recover her losses.”
    Owens touched the bandage around his skull. “Janey’s total losses were about $100,000. Not a large sum.”
    â€œBarely enough to finance the Afghan war for two or three minutes.”
    â€œI planned to reimburse her. Trouble was, I was caught short. Divorce had set me back a packet and, as I said, I’d lost money on Manson. I asked Janey to be patient, but she was like a . . . ” words temporarily failed him. “She was a . . .  termagant , is that the word for an ill-tempered woman? She went completely crazy, nuts. I spoke to Janey’s lawyer, explained my position. He was very decent, suggested I make one last try with Janey. Try to patch things up personally. I couldn’t reach her. She wouldn’t return my phone calls. This is a small town, though. I knew I was bound to run into her eventually, and I did. About two weeks ago, at Pinky’s. She was drunk, but seemed in a good mood. She even smiled at me. The next thing I knew, I was in hospital with a fractured skull.”
    â€œYou were in a fight?”
    â€œI’m an accountant, for chrissake, not a longshoreman. A fight broke out and this bruiser came at me out of the blue, brained me with a bottle.”
    â€œAnd you’ve no idea who he was?”
    â€œNo idea. I wouldn’t necessarily call it an attack on me personally. I was just an unlucky bystander. However, I have to assume he was a friend of Janey’s. Lying in hospital with a non-stop migraine is no fun, but it had one benefit. When I came out, I was cured of Janey Colby.”
    â€œHow long were you in hospital?”
    â€œAbout a week. I had a minor skull fracture. The doc wouldn’t let me go till my headaches eased up.”
    â€œWhen’s the last time you visited the Rainbow