Free Swarm (Dead Ends) by G.D. Lang Page A

single chip actually being eaten
A croquet set with all of the balls missing
A ski jacket that was two sizes too big for me and also had the sleeves clumsily cut off
A bottle of Vicodin prescribed to a name I didn’t recognize, inexplicably filled to the brim with Skittles
    “Woooow” Jane exhaled. “You clearly have A LOT more fun than me. What’s your secret?”
    “Substance abuse and an overall lack of self respect mostly” I joked.
    “That’ll do it, I suppose.” Jane picked up one of the funny looking dumbbells and slapped it into her other palm. “Well, these we can definitely use.”
    “Yeah” I responded as I picked up one of the cheaply made croquet mallets. “I think this thing is made out of balsa wood.” I threw it back in the trunk and grabbed all of the food and tequila. “I guess I don’t really need to close it” I said as I threw my keys in the trunk and said my goodbyes. We began the walk back trying to avoid the overturned SUV with the undead baby on board when we heard a blood-curdling scream coming from the Jeep. Zoe was in trouble.

Chapter 8
    I dropped everything, grabbed the odd-shaped dumbbell from Jane’s hands and leapt into a full out sprint, dodging debris just as adeptly as any Olympic hurdler. The walk to the car had been a slow one so the distance didn’t seem like much until right now as I struggled desperately to close the gap like a parent who has just witnessed their child’s first fall from a jungle gym. I could hear crying now. My grip tightened around the handle of this piece of exercise equipment that could easily pass for a medieval weapon. Its weight had slowed me down but that same weight could slow down a zombie permanently. I pictured all of the ways I could utilize it, mentally nutting up for what could be yet another blood bath. I tried to slow down as I reached the rear driver’s side but my legs seemed to be unwilling to put on the brakes with such little warning. I grabbed onto the chrome taillight guard on the passenger side and used my momentum to swing myself around to Zoe’s location, ready to bludgeon whatever it was that made her cry out in agony. I turned the corner to see Ricky kneeling down and attempting to bite Zoe’s hand or wrist. Zoe turned to me and screamed all over again as Ricky looked up and fell backwards onto his butt, his hands in a defensive position.
    “Whoa, whoa!” he yelled, his voice crackling with fear. “She just cut her hand, that’s all. I was just tearing off some medical tape to keep the gauze secure.” His legs defied him as he attempted to get to his feet, wobbling like a punch-drunk boxer looking for the ropes. I think I had scared him twice as much as Zoe’s scream had scared me.
    I dropped the weight and bent over, my hands resting on my knees as I tried to catch my breath. “Jesus Christ” I said gasping. I took a few more whooping breaths before I glanced over to the open rear door, the sight of blood demanding my attention. There was a significant amount of it covering the door jam and soaking into the faded carpeting. I nodded towards it, “Is that all Zoe’s blood?”
    Ricky glanced at it, “No, thank God. That was there already. Zoe’s blood is on the ground.” He pointed to a relatively small blotch of dark red dotting the pavement. He looked at me now trying to massage a stitch out of my ribcage. “You ok? You look like hell.”
    “Yeah…” I said, still struggling to steady my breathing. “It’s been a while since I ran like that. Good practice I guess.”
    Ricky chuckled, “ain’t that the truth.”
    Jane finally made her way to the Jeep, sporting a limp and jeans with a hole in the knee that was about twice the size it was just a few minutes ago. A minute amount of blood dotted the area just below her kneecap. She was looking at her palms, no doubt scraped up from attempting to brace herself for a fall.
    “I’m fine” she blurted out before any of us could say anything. “I just