Free Plays Unpleasant by George Bernard Shaw Page A

you, somehow.
    COKANE [
mortified
] You have no delicacy of feeling, Trench: no tact. I never mention it to any one; but nothing, I am afraid, will ever make a true gentleman of you. [
Sartorius appears on the threshold of the hotel
]. Here is my friend Sartorius, coming, no doubt, to ask you for an explanation of your conduct. I really should not have been surprised to see him bring a horsewhip with him. I shall not intrude on the painful scene.
    TRENCH . Dont go, confound it. I dont want to meet him alone just now.
    COKANE [
shaking his head
] Delicacy, Harry, delicacy! Good taste! Savoir faire! [
He walks away. Trench tries to escape in the opposite direction by strolling off towards the garden entrance
].
    SARTORIUS [
mesmerically
] Dr Trench.
    TRENCH [
stopping and turning
] Oh, is that you, Mr Sartorius? How did you find the church?
    Sartorius, without a word, points to a seat. Trench, half hypnotized by his own nervousness and the impressiveness of Sartorius, sits down helplessly
.
    SARTORIUS [
also seating himself
] You have been speaking to my daughter, Dr Trench.
    TRENCH [
with an attempt at ease of manner
] Yes: we had a conversation – quite a chat, in fact – while you were at the church with Cokane. How did you get on with Cokane, Mr Sartorius? I always think he has such wonderful tact.
    SARTORIUS [
ignoring the digression
] I have just had a word with my daughter, Dr Trench; and I find her under the impression that something has passed between you which it is my duty as a father – the father of a motherless girl – to inquire into at once. My daughter, perhaps foolishly, has taken you quite seriously; and –
    TRENCH . But –
    SARTORIUS . One moment, if you will be so good. I have been a young man myself: younger, perhaps, than you would suppose from my present appearance. I mean, of course, in character. If you were not serious –
    TRENCH [
ingenuously
] But I was perfectly serious. I want to marry your daughter, Mr Sartorius. I hope you dont object.
    SARTORIUS [
condescending to Trench’s humility from the mere instinct to seize an advantage, and yet deferring to Lady Roxdale’s relative
] So far, no. I may say that your proposal seems to be an honorable and straightforward one, and that it is very gratifying to me personally.
    TRENCH [
agreeably surprised
] Then I suppose we may consider the affair as settled. It’s really very good of you.
    SARTORIUS . Gently, Dr Trench, gently. Such a transaction as this cannot be settled off-hand.
    TRENCH . Not off-hand, no. There are settlements and things, of course. But it may be regarded as settled between ourselves, maynt it?
    SARTORIUS . Hm! Have you nothing further to mention?
    TRENCH . Only that – that – No: I dont know that I have, except that I love –
    SARTORIUS [
interrupting
] Anything about your family, for example? You do not anticipate any objection on their part, do you?
    TRENCH . Oh, they have nothing to do with it.
    SARTORIUS [
warmly
] Excuse me, sir: they have a great deal to do with it. [
Trench is abashed
]. I am resolved that my daughter shall approach no circle in which she will not be received with the full consideration to which her education and her breeding [
here his self-control slips a little: and he repeats, as if Trench has contradicted him
] – I say, her breeding – entitle her.
    TRENCH [
bewildered
] Of course not. But what makes you think my family wont like Blanche? Of course my father was a younger son; and Ive had to take to a profession and all that; so my people wont expect us to entertain them: theyll know we cant afford it. But theyll entertain us: they always ask me.
    SARTORIUS . That wont do for me, sir. Families often think it due to themselves to turn their backs on newcomers whom they may not think quite good enough for them.
    TRENCH . But I assure you my people arnt a bit snobbish. Blanche is a lady: thatll be good enough for them.
    SARTORIUS [
moved
] I am glad