Free THE PRACTICAL PRINCESS and Other Liberating Fairy Tales by Jay Williams

INTRODUCTION
    Possibly the wittiest and best writer of fairy tales with a contemporary twist, Jay Williams here presents the reader with a sextet of irresistibly plucky heroines.
    Their fates are, of course, intertwined with an equal number of surprisingly atypical heroes.
    There is the Princess Bedelia, “as lovely as the moon shining upon a lake full of waterlilies…as graceful as a cat leaping,” and also practical enough to slay the dragon that is terrorizing her father’s kingdom. Or take Petronella, brave, kind, talented and beautiful, who sets out to uphold an old family tradition, in her own fashion, by rescuing a prince in distress. She succeeds, only to discover that the prince is not worth the trouble. She weds a bold enchanter, instead. As for Sylvia, tired of royal life, she rescues herself from utter boredom by helping a charming, if bumbling, prince, Stupid Marco, successfully complete a quest.
    Victoria is an emperor’s daughter, with “large, merry brown eyes and long brown hair in two braids down her back.” The knight, Philbert the Fearful, who saves her from an ogre blithely refuses the gift of half a kingdom that goes with her hand in marriage. He is content simply to have Victoria.
    The heroine of The Silver Whistle , Prudence, is a commoner with “a snub nose, a wide mouth, straight straw-colored hair, and so many freckles that it looked as if someone had sprinkled her with cinnamon.” Given the chance to be the most beautiful girl in the kingdom, she turns it down: “I don’t think I want to be beautiful, I might be different outside but I’d be the same inside,, and I’m used to me the way I am.” She wins Prince Pertinel’s heart anyhow, because he happens to like freckles.
    Yet another commoner is the heroine of Forgetful Fred , Melissa, Girl Friday to the Witch of Grimly Wood. Delighted with Fred’s good nature, his talents as a musician, and his offhand attitude toward accomplishing a mission worth millions, Melissa rebels against her employer and ends up the mistress of her own fate-and Fred’s, too.
    Mr. Williams is a true craftsman of the topsy-turvy fairy tale. When Forgetful Fred finally achieves his mission, for example, he absent-mindedly loses the treasure before he can ever collect his reward.
    Success always comes where and when it is least expected, and surprising plot turns occur with refreshing regularity. What is more, not a single helpless damsel can be discovered in any of these jaunty and thoroughly absorbing stories. Today’s fairy-tale fans will read with relish the exploits of these unheroic heroes and gustily independent heroines.
    Selma G. Lanes

THE PRACTICAL PRINCESS
    Princess Bedelia was as lovely as the moon shining upon a lake full of waterlilies. She was as graceful as a cat leaping. And she was also extremely practical.
    When she was born, three fairies had come to her cradle to give her gifts as was usual in that country.
    The first fairy had given her beauty. The second had given her grace. But the third, who was a wise old creature, had said, “I give her common sense.”
    “I don’t think much of that gift,” said the King Ludwig, raising his eyebrows, “What good is common sense to a princess? All she needs is charm.”

    Nevertheless, when Bedelia was eighteen years old, something happened which made the king change his mind.
    A dragon moved into the neighborhood. He settled in a dark cave on top of a mountain, and the first thing he did was to send a message to the king. “I must have a princess to devour,” the message said,
    “or I shall breathe out my fiery breath and destroy the kingdom.”
    Sadly, King Ludwig called together his councilors and read them the message. “Perhaps,” said the Prime Minister, “we had better advertise for a knight to slay the dragon? That is what is generally done in these cases.”
    “I’m afraid we haven’t time,” answered the king.
    “The dragon has only given us until tomorrow morning. There