Free SharingGianna by Lacey Thorn

you’ve come to confess your sins and pray, Gianna
Nicollete.”
    Gianna sighed. “No, Mamma. I have nothing to confess.”
    “And this is why I say you can be no child of mine. My child
should know the precious gift that a child is.”
    “Trust me, Mamma. I know that more than you could imagine.”
    “You know nothing. You flaunt yourself like no Marquetti
woman should. Parading on the television and in all the magazines in your
underwear for all the world to see.”
    “It’s called modeling, Mamma.”
    “It’s called looking like a whore, Gianna. That’s what it’s
called.”
    Gianna felt the first tear slip down her cheek. “I remember
the last time you called me that. Just before you ordered me out of your
house.”
    “I expected more of you, Gianna. I raised you to be a proper
lady, to show Marquetti pride. I raised you to believe in God and obey his
commandments.”
    Gianna felt her backbone turn to steel as anger flooded her.
“And I expected a mother who loved me enough to listen to me, to give me the
chance to tell you the truth.”
    “There was nothing to say.”
    “Nothing but the truth.”
    “I took the call, Gianna. The clinic called to verify your
appointment. An appointment I knew nothing about. You did not wish to talk to
me before you broke commandments and made decisions on your own. You knew all
the right answers. You did this. I only gave you what it seemed you wanted.
Independence.” Her mother spit the word as if it were acid on her tongue.
    “I know.” And there had been no chance to tell her mom how
drastically things had changed for her or that she hadn’t known about the
appointment either. That had been made by Michael and his mother because that’s
what they thought best.
    “You should—”
    “Enough, Mamma,” Gianna interrupted her mother then moved to
stand in front of her when she appeared ready to walk away. “Sit down, please.
It’s past time I made you listen. It’s past time you remembered that Marquetti
is my name too.”
    Her mother glared at her and began working her fingers along
the rosary she held in her hand.
    “I was alone and scared the day I found out I was pregnant.
I knew that you and Pops would be upset with me.”
    “We would have figured something out.”
    “I didn’t want to see the disappointment in your eyes again,
Mamma. You were always disappointed in me. I was your failure. The Marquetti
who always screwed everything up.” Her mother’s silence spoke louder than words
in that moment and another tear slid down Gianna’s cheek.
    “I went to Michael. I didn’t know what to do and he was the
father. His mom came to see me a few days later. They both thought it would be
best for all of us if I had an abortion.”
    Her mother’s hands tightened on her rosary. “You go against
our faith, your faith. And you say you have no need to ask God’s forgiveness?
    “I begged then. I prayed and prayed and he gave me hell. I
was afraid, so afraid.”
    “You made your choice, Gianna. You must live with it.”
    “Yes, Mamma. I have to live with that choice. I didn’t know
about the appointment for the abortion. Michael’s mom made it for me. She
signed the permission form required. But I didn’t know about it.”
    Her mother’s head finally came up and her eyes met Gianna’s.
    Gianna nodded. “That’s right. The day you got that phone
call I was two counties over, where I’d scheduled a doctor’s appointment but
ended up waking up in the hospital a few days later. I’d decided to keep my
baby. I had been having stomach pain but I just thought it was the pregnancy
and because of the stress I was under. Turns out I had what’s called an ectopic
pregnancy. My baby never had a chance. I almost died. There were days that I
wished I did just so I wouldn’t see the hate in your eyes.” She bit back a sob,
shaking her head to fight the rush of emotion that threatened to overtake her.
    “I wanted you. I needed you to hold me, to tell me it