Free Songs of the Dead by Derrick Jensen

yet be prepared to take another person into her body.”
    â€œThat reminds me,” Allison said, “of something I read a few years ago. It was an anarchist analysis of sexual behavior of college students. It seemed so true that I’ve never forgotten it: ‘Sexual activity, long repressed, is now tolerated within the context of relationships which could only be described as masturbatory. If it had any meaning, if it opened up new realms of communication, sex would be a force antagonistic to schooling—instead it is a safety valve.’”
    â€œOf course that applies to more than college students.”
    â€œAnd of course it applies to more than schooling. We can just change one word and that last sentence still works: ‘If it had any meaning, if it opened up new realms of communication, sex would be a force antagonistic to civilization—instead it is a safety valve.’”
    I’m sure you can see why I fell in love with her.
    She said, “But you haven’t said anything about groupies yet.”
    â€œI’d been told before I went on my first book tour that I might encounter groupies. My feelings about casual sex notwithstanding, I didn’t want to prejudge. I wanted to remain open to finding out what I really thought about all of this—and once again, Allison, don’t worry, it all ends up cool. So the first night on the first tour I end up talking after my gig with this amazing activist who spent a lot of the seventies underground as a violent revolutionary. We have a great conversation that lasted till three or four. It would have been inappropriate for the conversation to turn sexual for any number of reasons, not the least of which is that she’s a lesbian. But there were other reasons, too. I go to the next town, do the noon gig, then sleep till evening. That night I had another talk, and then afterwards I am scheduled to do an interview at a pirate radio station. I’d spoken with the people who would be interviewing me, and I knew the conversation would be good. Well, that night at my talk there was a woman sitting in the front row who is one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen. I’d say she’s about one five-hundredth as beautiful as you, which should let you know how gorgeous she was. She was as beautiful as a tree or rock or bird. She was just blessed that way, as you are. She spends the whole talk giving me the look , and afterwards I announce to the crowd that I am hungry, and ask if anyone would like to go with me to get something to eat. She is the only one who sticks around. But I have the interview, so I call the station to get directions—because it’s a pirate station they don’t give out directions beforehand. No one answers. We go to dinner, and it takes about ten minutes for the conversation to devolve to, ‘What’s your favorite movie?’ Hers is ‘that classic, Top Gun .’ She is still very interested in me. So I had a stark choice: I could either have sex with a physically beautiful woman with whom I had no interest in having a conversation, or I could have a great conversation about things that matter with the people at the radio station.”
    â€œAnd?”
    â€œI went to the payphone and called the station. They answered and I got directions. I realized that night that the important thing to me is not and has never been sex. The important thing to me is the conversation, and if it’s appropriate for our bodies to enter the conversation, as it has been for yours and mine, so much the better. I don’t want you because you are beautiful. I want you because of who you are, which includes but is certainly not limited to your beauty.”
    â€œI realized long ago,” Allison said, “that I could never make love with anyone who didn’t understand that the dominant culture is killing the planet, or with someone who couldn’t make love with trees, rivers,