Free Gutbucket Quest by Piers Anthony

strong and independent and sure of themselves. Tried to teach them to be free. Unfortunately, once they’d learned all that, they discovered, as well, that he was a weak man with problems of his own. A man who didn’t know how to do much of anything but love, desperately. And knowing how to love didn’t support any relationship. So they ended up abandoning him, going on to better, more successful things, leaving Slim with a badly broken heart and a total lack of understanding.
    His biggest problem, his secret problem, was the hurt and rage he felt for women. He couldn’t understand why they all left him, why they all broke his heart. And, not understanding, he was hurt that much more, and the hurt turned to rage and bitterness. Yet, it all stayed inside him. He loved women so intensely, needed them so desperately, that he had never said a cruel word, never struck a blow, was absolutely terrified to even argue.
    Arguing, even expressing his feelings, wasn’t something he could do very well. His father had been an alcoholic, a cruel, manipulative man who couldn’t stand to be contradicted. And Slim never knew what would be seen as argument. In his home, emotions were stifled, repressed. The failure to do anything but hide and remain emotionless resulted in getting beaten, punished, put down and put out.
    So he swallowed his rage, repressed his hurt and anger. Inside, though, was a gentle man who wanted to ask why, why wasn’t he worth loving forever? Why did they all hurt and betray him? Whywere they always so heartless and compassionless? Why, why, why? He’d never found any answers because, in his soul-deep need to love and be loved, he’d never even think to broach the questions, except inside himself. He just wanted everything to be nice.
    But Nadine was different. Slim could tell that she knew who she was, that she didn’t need to wake up to anything at all. If he could just do right, maybe he could find a way she could love him. He’d never believed in love at first sight. It had happened to him a thousand times with a thousand women, but he’d always put it down to lust. But here was Nadine, knocking his heart for a loop. He would find a way, he determined. He would find a way if it killed him. Maybe this search for the Gutbucket was the perfect way to prove himself to her.
    He sighed when they pulled up to the house. Nadine took her hand off his leg and got out of the truck. He felt a distinct loss as they all went inside.
    “You mind sleepin’ on the couch?” Progress asked. “Gonna be a little crowded with Nadine here. Only got the two bedrooms.”
    “Nah,” Slim said. “No problem.” It looked like a big, comfortable couch, and Slim had slept on worse.
    “Nadine,” Progress said, “go get some sheets and all for Slim, would you, please?”
    To Slim’s surprise, she went off into the other room, bringing back sheets and a thin cover, and even put them on the couch without a word. Then she and Progress went into the bedrooms and Slim was left alone.
    It had been one hell of a long, strange day. His body and brain were both tired out, so not many minutes went by after he undressed and lay down before he was fast asleep, dreaming of a caramel-skinned woman running beside him in the cane breaks . . .

    It wasn’t quite light outside as Progress and Nadine whispered in the bedroom.
    “Daddy, why do you want that long-haired fool around here? What good is he going to do you?”
    “Don’t rightly know as yet. But deep down, he’s a good man. You can see it in him, see the boy’s been hurt, and hurt bad. But he don’t be pushin’ it off on nobody else. Just as nice as he can be. There’s somethin’ shinin’ inside him, fightin’ to get out.”
    “But you don’t even know if he can play.”
    “No, now, I do know. I ain’t heard him yet, that’s true, but I knows. You gots to understand that he came here from a completely different place, holdin’ on to that guitar of his like it was