Free An Illusion of Trust (Sequel to The Brevity of Roses) by Linda Cassidy Lewis Page B

plying him with her excellent pies. The three of them are debating meringue versus cream when a phone call from Azadeh interrupts. I study Jalal's face as he listens and before he says a word, I'm on my feet. "We have to go," I tell Judith and Hank.
    "We're on our way," Jalal says into the phone a second later. He pockets his phone and says, "The baby has a fever."
    I'm almost to the car when he catches up with me. "Aza said a
slight
fever," he says, "probably just the beginning of a cold."
    "I shouldn't have left her," I say.
    "This is no big deal." He slips the key in the ignition. "You deserved a couple of hours for yourself."
    "Good mothers put their children first."
    Jalal sits silent for a moment. From the corner of my eye, I see him looking at me. I motion for him to get the car moving, and he starts the engine, but before he puts it in gear he says, "You
are
a good mother, Renee. Why are you so down on yourself?"

    "I'm sorry I made you come home," Aza says when we walk in. "Now I think it's only teething." She hands the baby to me. "Look at her lower gum."
    I pull down Mia Grace's lip. It's true; her gum is red and swollen. I offer her the breast to calm her fussing. "I'm still not sure we shouldn't call the doctor."
    "I believe we had this same scare when Adam first teethed," Jalal says. "Remember?"
    I scream, startling Mia Grace, who begins to cry.
    "She bit down?" Azadeh asks.
    I nod and gingerly let the baby reattach. "I guess it
is
the teething." I sway in place to sooth her. "How long has Adam been asleep?"
    "Since two minutes past seven," Aza says. "He was out before I read halfway through
Snuggle Puppy
."
    "Thanks for watching them, Aza. I'm going to go kiss Adam and then get her to sleep."
    "I need to get a book downstairs," Jalal says, "and then I'll be in."
    Before I turn toward Adam's room, I catch the glance between Jalal and Aza. I've learned to interpret some of the signals between them. That was the one that says
I need to talk to you
. Let them talk. This time, Aza was the one who over-reacted.

    We're sitting up in bed. Jalal read while I nursed Mia Grace, who is now asleep but hasn't relinquished the comfort of the breast. "Can you hold her for a minute?" I slide the tip of my finger between my nipple and her tongue to break the suction. "I have to pee."
    When I come back into the bedroom, Jalal is alone in the bed. Before I can even open my mouth, he points to the alcove and says, "I put her in the crib."
    "Jalal—"
    "She is only ten feet away. Come here; I want to talk to you."
    Uncertain I want to hear what he has to say, I stop at the foot of the bed. His brows ripple in humored question and he pats the mattress where I'd sat with the baby. Okay, I'll sit, but I'm not listening to another speech about my over-protectiveness.
    As soon as I sit, Jalal slides down on his side, pulling me flat beside him. He clears a stray lock of hair from my lashes. "I love you," he says. "Do you believe that?"
    "Is there any reason I shouldn't?"
    "What kind of answer is that?"
    "I believe you."
    "And?"
    "I love you too."
    "I have to say, your enthusiasm does not exactly boost my ego."
    "Boo hoo. You have enough ego for both of us."
    "The problem is, sweet love, I do not. I would gladly give you some of my
confidence
, but you resist me all the way."
    He lifts one of my hands and presses the palm flat against his chest. He does this when he's being particularly sincere, as if my fingertips can detect that from his heartbeat. Maybe it's a Persian thing. I never remember to ask at a more appropriate time.
    "Why will you not believe you are a wonderful mother?" he asks.
    Oh no. Not discussing this. I glance at the baby. "If we're quiet," I say, "we could do something more fun than talk." I try to slide my hand down his belly, but he grabs it.
    "I thought you agreed to drop the evasion tactics when we need to discuss these things."
    "I just don't feel like having a serious conversation tonight." I try to press closer