Free Moonlight Murder: An Inept Witches Mystery by Amanda A. Allen, Auburn Seal Page A

he wouldn't be stupid enough to leave the evidence right? Like he would have cleaned up the blood and dug the bullets out of the wall or whatever? ”
    “ You ’ ve been watching a lot CSI, haven ’ t you Emmy my dove? ”
    Emily shrugged, refusing to be ashamed of her useful addictions. “ Well, you know. I don't have a job. And with this island becoming a hotbed of homicidal maniacs, it ’ s probably good I know what I'm talking about. ”
    Ingrid laughed, moving through the house as they bantered. “ I can see the book title now. All I Need to Know to Solve Murders, I Learned from Crime Shows on Netflix . ”
    Emily ran with her idea. “ Oh, I like it. We should co-author it. It will be fun. We can drink wine and pretend like we are super famous authors. I mean, we are already super rich. All we are missing is fame. ”
    “ True enough,” Ingrid said. “Although it is possible that if we are connected to enough murders, we could become infamous murderesses. The Sage Island Serial Killers. Has a nice ring, don't you think? ”
    “Do you want fame or infamy, dear Ingrid?”
    “Good point. Infamous is not the same thing as famous. I want fame. So I can rub it in Gabe's face. But we could get famous by writing that last book you mentioned. We should come up with a pen name. ”
    They continued walking through the house, finding no evidence of any kind of fight or bloody massacre.
    “ This isn ’ t working, ” Emily said. “ And no pen name. We want fame, right? We have to use our real names. ”
    “ Yeah, you ’ re probably right. We ’ ll win the Nebula award for our murder mystery. I ’ ll want Gabe to know that he is the incompetent sheriff character in my book. ”
    Emily cleared her throat.
    Ingrid fake apologized. “ Sorry, our book. ”
    Emily continued. “ Plus, the Nebula award is for science fiction. Not mystery. ”
    “ Whatever, we ’ ll just create our own planet and set the mystery there. There. Science fiction. Easy peasy. ”
    They were upstairs now in the master bedroom, and they both froze when they heard the front door open.
    “ It ’ s okay, ” Emily whispered. “ I got this. You think it's Tia or Kevin? If it ’ s Tia, I ’ ll clock her from behind with a candlestick. If it ’ s Kevin, I ’ m going to use the wrench. And I ’ ll hit him a few more times to knock sense into him. ”
    “ It has to be Tia. Kevin drives a loud ugly truck. We would have heard him drive up. Just like that cheating dove to sneak up on us. ”
    Just then Tia came into her bedroom, catching them red-handed. Her eyes were red from crying and she was wearing stained sweats and a holey t-shirt.
    “ What the hell are you guys doing in here? ”
    “ Sheesh, Tia. That ’ s no way to greet someone who has come over to check on you. ” Emily thought on her feet as she spoke. “ You look unwell. We figured you ’ d be feeling terrible about your lover's murder so we thought we would check on you. ”
    Ingrid chimed in, playing along. “ We were going to bring a casserole, but then we remember that we don ’ t cook so we, uh, we wanted to see what kind of wine you like. We brought some back from St. Maarten's and we don ’ t mind sharing. Especially when there ’ s been a murder …”
    Emily smirked at a speechless Tia. They were being damned mean-girl to her, but she was cheating on her husband and those actions were completely screwing up Ingrid ’ s life. Tia deserved a little bit of harsh.
    Tia smirked. “ Get out. You aren ’ t here to help me. I ’ ll call the cops. ”
    Emily watched Ingrid ’ s face change at the mention of the cops, the wound of Gabe ’ s break-up re-opening. Emily lashed out at Tia. “ You won ’ t call the cops because if you do, I'll tell your husband, Deputy Dumbass, that you are sleeping with his murder victim. You ’ ll look guilty. Maybe you are. Did you murder Sheldon? Maybe he was bad in bed and you couldn ’ t take it anymore? Or maybe he was going to