Free Slightly Foxed by Jane Lovering

drawled back. "Good trip?" He was
    sitting cross legged on the floor reading a newspaper.
    "Very clever. Where's Florrie? And why are you here
    again? You're becoming ubiquitous, aren't you?"
    "Yeah. Totally. In fact, I'm going for omnipresence next."
    Piers stretched out his legs to reveal that he was wearing
    striped jeans and an equally stripy shirt. "Flo's run down to
    the pizza place on the corner, we were both kinda hungry."
    Grainger appeared out of my bedroom, treating me with
    the disdain he reserved for anyone who'd been missing for
    more than a couple of hours and cheap cat food. I stroked his
    sticky fur and realised I could feel his backbone. "Grainger?
    77

    Slightly Foxed
    by Jane Lovering
    Are you okay?" I watched him sway towards the kitchen. "Do
    you think Grainger could have worms?"
    "Nah. He's all right, aren't you?" To my horror, Piers swept
    Grainger up off the floor and contained him against his chest.
    "Piers, be careful. He..." But Grainger just let out a throaty
    kind of grumble and submitted to the petting with the
    embarrassed air of someone trying on a new suit that they
    secretly think makes them look really good. "...he actually
    likes you," I finished, slightly puzzled.
    "Yeah. Seems to." Piers let Grainger jump to the floor.
    "But you're right, he does look a bit..."
    "Manky. He looks manky." I glanced up at the sound of the
    front door opening and Florence entering, rustling plastic
    bags. "Don't you think he looks a bit manky, Florrie?"
    "Oh, hi, Mum. Yeah, completely. It's a shit outfit, Piers."
    "Not Piers, Grainger. Although you're right, it is a horrible
    combination. What happened, did you get dressed under the
    influence?"
    "Hey, no ganging up on me, girls." Piers backed away,
    hands held in an attitude of surrender, but he looked furtively
    rather pleased. Florence went to put the pizzas onto plates in
    the kitchen and Piers followed me back through, helping me
    to pull the table out so we could all sit round it. "It's not that
    bad, is it, Alys?"
    "I can't honestly tell, Piers. I can't focus on it for long
    enough."
    "Ah well. At least it gets me noticed."
    "Lucky it doesn't get you arrested."
    78

    Slightly Foxed
    by Jane Lovering
    Florence came back with slices of pizza arranged
    haphazardly on too-small plates. I was hungry. Leo hadn't
    provided any breakfast and anyway, he was so gorgeous that
    my appetite knew when it was beaten. All three of us ate in a
    companionable silence.
    "Mum..." Florence eventually broke the chewing silence.
    "I've got something to ask you."
    "Yeeeeeessss?" I said, dubiously. She was being way too
    nice for this to be good.
    "Do you promise you're not going to be mad?"
    I became motherish. "I think you mean angry not mad.
    You're getting influenced by Piers and his dreadful mid-
    Atlantic phraseology."
    "I'm American! I can't help that," Piers joined in, less
    indignant than he sounded; instead he looked sparky,
    animated. "And I think you mean being influenced not getting
    influenced. I might be American, but I can still do grammar."
    "Shame you can't do dress-sense," I said waspishly but he
    laughed.
    "Oh, Alys, I am wounded." He held a hand to his chest,
    rings gleaming. "To think I don't appeal to you because I
    have no sense of style. You shallow, shallow woman."
    Florence was watching this exchange with a baffled
    expression, obviously desperate to say yes, enough of this,
    now let's talk about me , but intrigued enough not to.
    "I didn't say you didn't appeal to me," I said without
    thinking, laughing despite myself at his ridiculousness. "I just
    said—" But Piers had leaped up and was grabbing his leather
    jacket from the back of his chair.
    79

    Slightly Foxed
    by Jane Lovering
    "No more! I am deeply offended, and I'm going. Leave you
    two females to your heavy talking. Oh, and Alys." He leaned
    forward and almost breathed in my ear. "Next time I'll try and
    wear something that does appeal to you, yeah?"
    Both Florence and I were giggling