Free Make Him Purr: A Paranormal BBW Werepanther Shape Shifter Mail-Order Navy SEAL Romance by Anya Nowlan

to say next. Please stay? Don’t go, maybe we can make this work? But make what work, exactly? They’d had sex once, and so far, Diesel had been little more than a benevolent gatekeeper, making sure she paid her dues and didn’t get into any more trouble for a few days. Not exactly the basis to build a relationship on, huh?
    Memories flooded back to him of that fateful day that had cost him his career and his ability to really share what he was feeling. He looked at her, his heart constricting. She seemed so small and vulnerable, standing there, unsure of what to do next. He was sure she hated it as much as he did – she was a proud woman, and not one to put herself in a position of weakness lightly.
    But could he ask her to stay if he wasn’t even sure that he could give her anything that she needed? What if his darkness just dragged her down too?
    Diesel pulled a hand through his hair, frustrated. How’d he got himself into this mess? Shifter Grove was supposed to be a new chance, a possibility to start fresh. And here she was, his new beginning, and he couldn’t reach out to her.
    “I think you should stay here for the night. It’s late and it’s not like we have a motel or anything in town yet. I’ll go pick up some dinner from Sunrise’s. Okay?” he asked, keeping his expression hard.
    Sonya’s mild annoyance turned into a look of utter sadness now. It hung about her for just a second before she wiped it away, looking impassive again. She nodded, spinning around and heading for the bathroom.
    “Sure. Get me some pie. I’ll take a shower,” she shot over her shoulder, disappearing behind the door.
    He stood there for a moment longer, fighting with the urge to just barge in after her and fuck her senseless in the shower. But instead of acting on it, he growled wordlessly at his own uncertainty and headed out the door.
    The engine roared to life and he floored it out of there, gravel flying in every direction on the driveway. At best, he felt stupid, and at worst, he felt like he’d failed her.
    Should have never acted on it, he told himself.
    But that, of course, was bullshit. It had been a long time since he’d had quite as much fun as he had with Sonya, and he knew it wasn’t just that. It wasn’t just a quick bang with a woman he had no interest in – spirits knew, he’d done plenty of that in his life, and he’d never left them feeling more than physically sated. But Sonya? She stayed with him. Like a happy haze that had been spread over him, he couldn’t stop thinking about her, or looking at her.
    He kept his hands on the steering wheel, gripping it so hard he thought he’d rip it right off. Adrenaline flushed through him as he thought back, remembering his last deployment. The lead for his squad, he’d spearheaded them through the jungles of another lost and forgotten Southern American country. His squad was an elite unit of shifter soldiers – his friends, his comrades, his brothers in arms.
    To this day, he wasn’t entirely sure what had happened. They were suddenly ambushed by an overwhelming force in an area they had stalked countless times and had designated as safe. The very people they were supposed to be hunting and eliminating came at them with a force three times bigger than Diesel knew to be there, and the battle was quick and brutal. In the end, it was just him standing in a sea of blood – both his squad’s and the hapless fools’ that had dared attack them.
    He could remember so clearly how his men looked, gasping for their last breaths. Glassy eyes staring right through him, their animals dying right along with them, and him helpless in the middle of it. To this day, he didn’t know why he had lived, why he had been the only one to survive. Sure, he was fast and strong, but so were the others. And Diesel certainly didn’t believe that there was some kind of higher power looking out for him.
    Rationally, he knew it was just a combination of expert training and pure,