Free Destined to Feel by Indigo Bloome

proverb
    Alexa
    After scrubbing my skin to remove the filth, jetlag and tears, I allow the steaming water to cascade over my tired and exhausted muscles, my emotions numb. My heart feels frozen. I don’t know how long I have been under this scorching rain of water and I don’t care. My brain seems incapable of making even the simplest of decisions. It isn’t until I realise I am in a crumpled heap on the floor of the shower and the water temperature is cooling over my limbs that I shudder and consider getting out. To what? I wonder. Where am I? Who has done this to me?
    Who could do this to me? There are no tears left to shed. I have more than used my quota.
    Even the plush towel I absentmindedly wrap around my shoulders feels raw and harsh against my skin. I glance in the direction of the mirror and am grateful it is steamed over. If I saw my face it might make this nightmare more real, more tangible and I don’t have the nerves to deal with that. I hesitate as I open the bathroom door, not completely sure what I have seen on the other side. I briefly remember glimpsing classical, almost antique-style furniture, a cupboard, bedside tables, a higher than normal double bed and a floral chaise longue as I emerged like an unidentified creature hatching from the case that held me prisoner for so long. I think I was in shock when light finally infiltrated my eyes and I realised I was breathing free of the mask. My binds had been discarded just as efficiently as they had been applied. No one was in the empty room when I cautiously peered about, stretching each of my agonised limbs slowly and carefully to allow the blood to flow back into my extremities after being confined for so long. The light of the bathroom had attracted my immediate attention as I crawled over to haul myself up onto the toilet. The shower quickly became my next point of call as I hastily removed the clothes I had been in for however many days or hours since I departed Melbourne. It seems like a lifetime ago.
    The curtains are open, nothing is shrouded in darkness and I marvel at being able to see out into the world. My eyes take a few minutes to adjust to the view before me. The countryside is beautiful: rolling hills and pastures with the sun sinking rapidly behind them, the sky being teased with the colours of dusk. Majestic mountains provide a picture-perfect backdrop — only if you were on holidays, I reprimand myself, which I most certainly am not! I place both hands on the window ledge to steady my balance as I continue to gaze, taking long deep breaths to fill my lungs and attempt to calm my returning panic. I notice how high above everything I am situated, the view all-encompassing. Too high to escape …the thought flitters through my head, although I do try the window but it cannot be opened.
    I am captured, imprisoned behind this small window in what appears to be some sort of castle. A distant memory reminds me that I have only ever stayed in one chateau before, just outside Reims when visiting Champagne in France, but the vision of the mountains before me must mean I am further east towards Austria, or Italy maybe, or perhaps on the outskirts of Eastern Europe. It’s impossible to be sure. I shudder at the unfathomable reality I face, compared to the delightful European adventures of my younger years. How did I end up in this mess? I know how it started and I just don’t want to go there. I notice the towel is pooled around my feet and I am naked as I continue to peer out the small window frame. I feel like Rapunzel without the luscious long locks to provide a means of escape, nor the handsome saviour — at least not yet. I desperately hope that Jeremy can trace my whereabouts, as I hold on tight to the only item on my body, my cherished bracelet. I raise it to my lips, willing Jeremy to sense where I am, willing him to save me from whoever has abducted me.
    No, I tell myself, no more tears, no more emotion. I am alive, albeit a little