Free The Secrets That We Keep by Isabel Lucero

eyelashes that every female would be jealous of, and he had a smooth, clean cut face. He was the complete opposite of my Julian, but still attractive in his own right. Julian is bulkier, more masculine with his thick muscles, five o’clock shadow, and chiseled jaw.
    I remember Lucas and I making plans to be together forever, I remember everything he said to me about our future.
    “If I could have my way Bell,” Lucas whispered to me while we were wrapped around each other in bed, “I would wake up every day to the warmth of your breath and the softness of your lips on my neck, the touch of your fingers caressing my skin, and the feel of your heart beating with mine, because I know that I will never find that feeling with anyone else but you.”
    “Promise we’ll be together forever?” I asked.
    “I promise I’m not going anywhere, I’ll always be here with you,” he answered, rubbing circles on my back with his fingers. “Nobody will love you the way I love you. You are my absolute everything Bell, you know that right? I can’t go a day without you in my life. You’re stuck with me sweetheart,” he finished with a laugh.
    I move d my head from the crook of his neck to look him in the eye and put my hand on the side of his face. Staring directly into his eyes I say, “It’s not considered being stuck with you when I choose to be with you, and I will always choose to be with you. Don’t forget that.”
    He lets out a little laugh. “Okay baby, I’ll hold you to that, so make sure you don’t forget it either.”
    I shake my head of the memories that are now flooding my mind. I shouldn’t be remembering all the good things Lucas and I had. He had left me, just up and gone with no explanation as to what had gone wrong. When I asked him, he merely said, “Bell, just move on with your life, okay? It will be better this way, I promise. I can’t protect you anymore and you need to find someone who can.”
    What the hell had that meant? Was he referring to the fact that he felt he couldn’t protect me from my own self destructive ways. I know I had started drinking heavily and had some crazy mood swings. I mean, what the hell was I supposed to do? My family was dead, of course I was angry, and of course I wanted to drown my sorrows. He couldn’t be mad at me for that. So he wanted me to find somebody else to deal with my problems? Lucas got scared and didn’t know how to handle me. He couldn’t figure out how to help me, so instead he made it worse by abandoning me and leaving me all by myself when I needed somebody the most. I would never forgive him for that.
    The slamming of the back door pulls me out of my memories and back to the present. Julian has just come back inside and is heading towards me with a look of determination in his face.
    “Give me the camera, I need to see those pictures,” he demands, while reaching out for the camera that’s still in my hands. I slowly hand it over to him while eyeing him carefully. His jaw is clenched and he looks really annoyed so I decide not to mention to him that one of the guys in the picture is my ex. I just don’t think it would lead to good things. He knows about Lucas, I’ve talked to him about our relationship before and how we had broken up and that I never saw him again. Julian doesn’t know what Lucas looks like though, so he would never be able to guess who is in that picture.
    Julian is scanning through the photos with his back towards me, so I continue to sit there and just stare at his back , waiting for him to question me about these guys. He finally turns and sits down next to me on the couch, his arm rubbing up against mine. “Okay, how do I zoom in on these?” he asks. I reach over and show him the little magnifying glass button and press it.
    He presses the same button a few more times trying to get as zoomed in as possible. He leans into the camera like I did and squints his eyes, no doubt trying to get a good look at these guys. He