Free 30 Nights by Christine D'Abo

rough.”
    Jasmine’s third degree was enough of a deterrent that I’d forgotten my embarrassment about Eric seeing me this morning. I’d chanced a look in the small locker mirror that I had tucked away in my drawer once I’d gotten Jasmine turned onto other topics.
    Holy shit I was horrid. Like horribad, horrid. Why Eric had wanted me to keep my meeting with him was beyond me. If his interest was solely in the cards, then maybe.
    But I couldn’t help but hope that he wanted more than that. More from me.
    The day became a weird mix of fast and incredibly slow leading up to the barbecue. Meetings and interviews would eat the clock only to be chased by prolonged periods of the second hand crawling at a snail’s pace when I had nothing to do. Jasmine was oblivious to my struggles, chatting away about summer students, professors, and changing course codes.
    God, this was insane. I was insane for wanting to go down this road in the first place. But the wheels had been set in motion and, like everything else in my life, once I started down a path I had to see it to the conclusion.
    Unlike the previous week, Jasmine stayed until three. I wanted to rush her out the door, but couldn’t. So I was forced to bide my time and wait. Finally, Jasmine’s computer dinged and a smile bloomed across her lips. “I think the rest of this can wait until next week.”
    “Oh? Heading out?” I should have been excited, but instead a wave of nerves fluttered throughout my innards.
    “Nell said that the registrar has gone for the day and she’s the last one in the office. Everyone else has already headed over to the party. I hate to see my wonderful girl all alone on a Friday afternoon.”
    “That would be terrible.”
    My excitement grew as Jasmine got her things together and headed out the door. It was still early enough in the day that there was lots of time for me to talk to Eric. I hadn’t seen him since my arrival this morning, but a quick glance down the hall told me that his door was closed. He must have left for the event as well.
    Shit.
    I’d half been hoping to catch him before he’d gone so we could have walked over together. Yeah, that was a bit preteen of me, but it would have been nice to gauge his mood, maybe get a feel for what he was thinking before we were thrust into a group.
    Even after Jasmine was gone, I didn’t get the cards and head out to the party. There was nothing stopping me now, nothing holding me back. Instead of doing what I’d been dreaming about for days now, I sat in my chair and stared.
    The cards were in my purse, waiting for me to free them, to bring them into the light of day. Eric and I might have a laugh over them. We’d share our thoughts over a beer and hamburger. There was no reason for me to wait, to procrastinate. No reason at all.
    And yet I didn’t move.
    Coward. I was a big, stupid coward.
    Great Glenna’s voice, mixed with Jasmine’s, echoed in my head. I was being foolish. With a growl, I fished the cards out of the hiding spot. My palms were damp now, and I had to rub them on my skirt to dry them off so the moisture wouldn’t absorb into the paper.
    Okay, I can do this. My hair had dried from earlier and the braid was still looking mostly neat. I’d just have to put the cards in my pocket and then I could get Eric alone for a few minutes and show him . . .
    Shit.
    When I got dressed this morning I didn’t think of the practicality of wearing this particular skirt. I didn’t have any pockets to hide the cards. And while I could take my purse with me, it was heavy and awkward and not something anyone else would have. Well then.
    I took them out of the bag and flipped the front card around. There, no one would be able to see what was written on them. I attached a paper clip to ensure they wouldn’t get loose and fly away. That was it then, I was all set.
    Ignoring my nerves, I grabbed the cards and left to chase my adventure.
     
    The crowd at the alumni building was