Chapter 1
Stella’s routine upon getting home from work was always the same: kick her shoes off and place them neatly next to the door before locking the door, turn up the radio, sprawl across the sofa in the living room of her modest condo, and read the newspaper in its entirety.
She had just finished reading the Business section of the newspaper when the telephone rang. “Hello?”
“Yes, hi. May I please speak to Stella Carmichael?”
“This is she. What’s this in reference to?”
“Well, Stella, I was wondering if you’ve made your vacation plans yet this summer?”
She rolled her eyes and asked, “What if I have?”
“Well, my name’s David, and I’m from Majestic Cruises and Vacations, International, or MCVI for short, and I’d like to offer you a chance to stay at our amazing resort, and we’d cover the airfare too. You don’t have to do it immediately; just come out some time in the next year and a half…”
“I’m not interested,” Stella said curtly.
Undeterred by her objection, the telemarketer asked, “Do you like going on vacation and getting away from all of the stresses of your day to day life?”
“Not really,” she said flatly, fairly certain he wouldn’t have a good rebuttal to this line. She often found that saying she didn’t like saving money, having fun, or otherwise doing things generally accepted as “right” was the easiest way to deter the more obnoxious telemarketers. She occasionally spoke fondly of the time she told a telemarketer who was trying to sell her an extended warranty that “my refrigerator is a piece of shit and I can’t wait for it to break down, so I can get a new one.”
“What do you mean, not really?”
Thinking quickly, she said, “I prefer to sleep in my own bed, eat the food in my own pantry, and generally stay at home.”
“So are you saying you lied to me before when you said you’ve made your plans for your vacation this summer?”
“I didn’t lie. You asked me if I’d made my plans and I said, ‘what if I have?’ I never said I had or hadn’t made my vacation plans, and even if I had said I’d made them, that wouldn’t mean I’d actually, you know, be going anywhere. As I said before, I’m not interested.”
“But you don’t even know where we have resorts you can go to!”
Stella started to raise her voice in annoyance. “What part of ‘I’m not interested’ don’t you understand?”
“Well, if you must know, it’s the ‘not’ part.” Stella couldn’t tell from his tone whether or not he was being sarcastic. “Everyone needs to get away at some point. Recent studies have even shown that we don’t get away as often as we should, and there are really big health benefits to taking even three days to go somewhere else, somewhere different. Both physical and emotional health, I might add. How could you not be interested in that?”
“Oh, I’m hoping to either go insane or die in the next five years. So the health benefits would be wasted on a girl like me.”
“I don’t believe you!”
“That’s your prerogative, to be sure. Bottom line is, I’m not going to ….”
Her words were cut off by a high-pitched sound that came through the phone. Despite the shrillness in tone, Stella didn’t and couldn’t move the phone away from her ear. Instead, she allowed the sound to interrupt, envelop, and overpower her.
The tone lasted for about ten seconds, followed by a moment of silence between Stella and the telemarketer who had called her. The telemarketer broke the silence. “Bottom line, ma’am, is what?”
“I… I’m sorry. I don’t remember what I was saying. Where were we?”
“You were about to decide which of our resorts you wanted to go to.
“Yes. Of course. What were my choices again?”
“Stateside, our biggest resorts are in Las Vegas, Miami, San Francisco, Boston, and Seattle.
Stella’s routine upon getting home from work was always the same: kick her shoes off and place them neatly next to the door before locking the door, turn up the radio, sprawl across the sofa in the living room of her modest condo, and read the newspaper in its entirety.
She had just finished reading the Business section of the newspaper when the telephone rang. “Hello?”
“Yes, hi. May I please speak to Stella Carmichael?”
“This is she. What’s this in reference to?”
“Well, Stella, I was wondering if you’ve made your vacation plans yet this summer?”
She rolled her eyes and asked, “What if I have?”
“Well, my name’s David, and I’m from Majestic Cruises and Vacations, International, or MCVI for short, and I’d like to offer you a chance to stay at our amazing resort, and we’d cover the airfare too. You don’t have to do it immediately; just come out some time in the next year and a half…”
“I’m not interested,” Stella said curtly.
Undeterred by her objection, the telemarketer asked, “Do you like going on vacation and getting away from all of the stresses of your day to day life?”
“Not really,” she said flatly, fairly certain he wouldn’t have a good rebuttal to this line. She often found that saying she didn’t like saving money, having fun, or otherwise doing things generally accepted as “right” was the easiest way to deter the more obnoxious telemarketers. She occasionally spoke fondly of the time she told a telemarketer who was trying to sell her an extended warranty that “my refrigerator is a piece of shit and I can’t wait for it to break down, so I can get a new one.”
“What do you mean, not really?”
Thinking quickly, she said, “I prefer to sleep in my own bed, eat the food in my own pantry, and generally stay at home.”
“So are you saying you lied to me before when you said you’ve made your plans for your vacation this summer?”
“I didn’t lie. You asked me if I’d made my plans and I said, ‘what if I have?’ I never said I had or hadn’t made my vacation plans, and even if I had said I’d made them, that wouldn’t mean I’d actually, you know, be going anywhere. As I said before, I’m not interested.”
“But you don’t even know where we have resorts you can go to!”
Stella started to raise her voice in annoyance. “What part of ‘I’m not interested’ don’t you understand?”
“Well, if you must know, it’s the ‘not’ part.” Stella couldn’t tell from his tone whether or not he was being sarcastic. “Everyone needs to get away at some point. Recent studies have even shown that we don’t get away as often as we should, and there are really big health benefits to taking even three days to go somewhere else, somewhere different. Both physical and emotional health, I might add. How could you not be interested in that?”
“Oh, I’m hoping to either go insane or die in the next five years. So the health benefits would be wasted on a girl like me.”
“I don’t believe you!”
“That’s your prerogative, to be sure. Bottom line is, I’m not going to ….”
Her words were cut off by a high-pitched sound that came through the phone. Despite the shrillness in tone, Stella didn’t and couldn’t move the phone away from her ear. Instead, she allowed the sound to interrupt, envelop, and overpower her.
The tone lasted for about ten seconds, followed by a moment of silence between Stella and the telemarketer who had called her. The telemarketer broke the silence. “Bottom line, ma’am, is what?”
“I… I’m sorry. I don’t remember what I was saying. Where were we?”
“You were about to decide which of our resorts you wanted to go to.
“Yes. Of course. What were my choices again?”
“Stateside, our biggest resorts are in Las Vegas, Miami, San Francisco, Boston, and Seattle.
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