Free Alex as Well by Alyssa Brugman

ask.
    ‘Nothing it’s just that—’
    ‘You look like the real thing,’ Lien finishes.

19
    I’M GOING TO see Crockett today. I shave my legs in the shower. I’m not really sure where you’re supposed to stop, so I keep going. It takes ages. I’m definitely going to have to find a better way to do this.
    I sing, ‘Hey, honey, take a walk on the wild side.’
    I pull on some knee-high socks with my steel-capped boots. I drag out my old grey school shorts and the butterfly T-shirt. I pull my hair up into two cute piggies on the top of my head. I tie a football jersey around my waist by the sleeves.
    In the mirror I look like a boy wearing his sister’s T-shirt. I put on really thick eyeliner and draw a star on my cheek with a pink texta. Then I draw little geisha lips. It’s weird. It’s a bit Gaga, and I love it. Gaga has given girls permission to be drag queens.
    I wait until I hear the shower start in my parents’ en suite and then I run down the stairs. I pinch a twentyfrom my mother’s wallet and leave a note on the kitchen table.
    Running late.
    Cya. A xx
    My mother has left a bracelet on the kitchen bench. It’s silver with shiny, black flowers and a butterfly in diamantes. It’s just junk jewellery from Target, but it’s eyecatching, and it goes with my shirt. I undo the clasp and slip it around my upper arm. It looks hot. I can do this high-street chic. I’m like Gok.
    I catch a bus into the city and check out the food hall, where our shop would be if we were dairy farmers from South Australia selling our boutique cheese in the city. Although, no one has asked me about my backstory for ages.
    There are so many beautiful clothes. I go into Cue and try on a few dresses. The shop assistant is all excited. She thinks I’m going to buy something. She keeps throwing dresses at me over the change-room door. But I don’t have enough money on me, and when I leave without buying anything she is shitty.
    I find a bedazzler for four dollars in one of those junk shops. I can’t believe it. Well, it’s a copy. It’s called a ‘Ka Jinker’. Onomatopoeia. Marketing genius. It comes with little coloured butterflies and glass buttons.
    There is a busker doing the statue thing.
    There’s an income for someone with zero skills, Alex says.
    I snigger. Yeah, because he didn’t even come up with the idea of being a statue.
    Alex and I go into ‘undergarments’ in DJs. March straight in. It’s all coloured bras at the front, and then the big white spinnakers for the grannies at the back.
    There’s a pale blue bra with little tiny orange flowers. It’s delicate and girlie. I get the cup size thing, because it’s common knowledge. I guess I’m an A, but there is a number too. I flick through them. They go from ten to eighteen. We’re going to have to try some on.
    Yeah, baby! says Alex, rubbing his hands together.
    I grab an eight, a twelve and a sixteen.
    I crouch down to the undies. There’re G-strings at the front, and then hipster knickers at the back of the rack. They’re all lace with a little orange ribbon. I slide a pair out from behind the others so I can get a better look.
    Woot! Alex loves it.
    ‘Boo!’ says a voice behind me.
    Startled, I turn around. It’s Ty.
    I’m holding undies. I try to put them back on the hanger, but I miss and they fall on the floor. I accidentally pull off a G-string, and that hits the floor too, so I drop the bras I’m holding, stand up quickly, and take a big step away from the undies.
    ‘Wow, you look hot!’ Ty says. He takes hold of my hand and lifts it up, as if he is asking me to dance.
    ‘Ta,’ I say, shaking him off. I hide my Ka Jinker in its plastic bag behind my back. He’s caught me off guard.I’m having a mild panic attack, wondering if I’ve missed something. I don’t feel right today.
    ‘What are you doing here?’ I ask, taking another sidewards step away from the undies.
    ‘Dentist,’ he says, pulling a face. He introduces me to his