Free Twisted (Delirium #1) by Cara Carnes

dreams.
    Rio had.
    The last time I’d spoken with him he’d been mourning the loss of yet another girlfriend. His loose tongue flew through every bitter regret he’d ever had as I tried to talk him off the ledge he’d chosen as his podium. The last minute of his life he’d stared me in the eye and imparted a truth I still woke up hearing even though a month had passed.
    You’re a different person than who I met in White Bluffs, a bitter one I made because I knew you’d never leave otherwise. I cut your heart out and buried it there. I shouldn’t have, man. I never should’ve made you leave her behind. You were right. We could’ve made it work with her at your side. Maybe with me not around you can get back what I ripped away. I’m sorry, man.
    Rio’s words haunted me. The dark cloud he’d left in his passing settled over me, the other guys. I’d shared his words with them because I hadn’t been the only one whose heart was left buried in White Bluffs. They’d deserved to hear what he’d said as much as I had. The truth within the man’s self-loathing gloom clung to me like a second skin.
    The limelight blinded me to what I should’ve held. Love. I’d broken her and had been so self-absorbed I hadn’t noticed. Assuming tonight went according to plan I’d spend every breath from this point forward making it up to her.
     
     

Chapter Seven
    Shasta
    “Why did I not know they were performing tonight?” I tugged backward on Bets as she yanked me up the metal bleachers, the very same ones we’d sat in for every football game and cheered Caleb, Chaz and Ace through. “I can’t handle this shit. Stop. Just. Stop.”
    Bets froze, pivoting in a slow circle on her platform shoes. Eyes wide, hands clutching her micro purse. “You yelled at me.”
    Angry tears loomed in my eyes. “I can’t be here. Please. I can’t.”
    “What the hell is going on in your head, Shas?” She closed the distance and lowered her voice. “Honey, talk to me.”
    Determined fingers grasped my chin and yanked until I locked gazes with her. Any hold on sanity I’d maintained when we pulled up into the parking lot of White Bluffs High collapsed beneath the weight of her friendship, the palpable concern.
    “It hurts too much. I could almost pretend no time had passed. I-I thought tonight we’d have more time and you put me in this,” I motioned toward the SBD and crazy high shoes as I teetered a little too far to the left. “Now I’m here with all the yahoos nosing around in my business. I want to go home and drown all the shit in my head in a gallon of tequila.”
    Bets glared down at the teenage boy looking up at us and listening attentively. She glared down at him. “You. Up. Gone. Now.”
    “This is a free country?”
    “Do you know who I am? Have you not heard enough to learn when Psycho Axe tells you to do something in White Bluffs, you listen? Now. Again. You. Up. Gone. Now.”
    The boy and his two buddies charged past us as Bets settled in the filled bleachers and patted the seat beside her. What the hell? I stared at her, too befuddled to speak.  
    “Sit. You aren’t the only one having issues, okay?” Bets stared out at the field as she chewed on her lower lip.
    I thudded to a perch and settled Caleb’s jacket over my knees since the smirking punks at the bottom of the bleachers were grinning up at me like I’d shown them the goods. I looked down. Shit. I probably had. Me and short SBDs didn’t jive very well, especially when I was navigating rickety aluminum walkways older than me.
    “I know it’s been intense, Shas, and I’m so fucking sorry everyone in the free world is watching.” She looked down at the football field where a small stage had been set up. The field lights struck the empty surface with impending finality.
    After whatever this was he’d be gone.
    “I doubt the entire free world is watching. No one cares about a frumpy uneducated muffin wielding barista from White Bluffs.” I