Free Twisted (Delirium #1) by Cara Carnes Page A

sighed and forced a positive spin on the epic cluster fuck going on in my mental vault. The good, bad and ugly emotions were throwing down and I honestly didn’t know which would win. “Besides, he’s better off without me.”
    I couldn’t imagine not having the past day with him, yet I hated the fact I succumbed to the temptation. Explaining said landmine of sensations Bets had inexplicably set off with her well-meaning gift was impossible, especially since I couldn’t explain it myself.
    “It’s a lot to take in with no time left. I mean, he’s leaving after this and then I’m back to whatever the hell I was doing before he flew back into my life like an avenging angel swooping down to play with his prey.”
    Silence settled between us a moment. I could feel the weight of her verdict. Damn. Through the years I’d managed to avoid the pitfall of Bets’ judgment most times, but I’d seen the fallout enough times thanks to unfortunate others to know I was screwed. She didn’t get what I was saying.
    And I couldn’t blame her.
    I didn’t get it either.
    “Wow. You believe the words you’re spewing.” She shook her head. “For a smart girl, you can be really dumb, girlfriend. Look, you lock away whatever’s chewing up your brain. Okay? If it helps calm whatever storm you have swirling away up there, I’ll tell you this. Your man called me and asked—no, outright demanded —I keep your ass here because he knew you were scurrying out of whatever the hell this is the moment he left you. I’m pissed because my BFF Shasta Monohan isn’t a chicken shit who scurries . My Shas faces things head on because our girl code commands so in rule number two.”
    Tears coursed down her cheeks as she took a deep breath. I mimicked her, allowing her verbal beating to pound sense into my Caleb-crazed mind.
    “ He didn’t just leave you . They left all of us, okay? You know what, though? You let him leave. You let all the ‘you’re worthless’ bull your mom spewed ooze into your brain and you didn’t think you were good enough for him. He left because you didn’t give him a reason to stay.” She took another deep breath. “The thought of his leaving wrecks you? Cowgirl the hell up and give him a reason to stay.”
    Beaten into my quivering place, I remained silent as my best friend seethed beside me. I got her words, felt every single one ram into place. She was right. Somehow unlocking the vault on what’d once been Caleb opened all the others I’d sealed shut—things he’d slammed the door on long ago.
    I still had tonight. No matter the result, I’d share my thoughts, purge my need for him. He deserved to know I loved him, even if confessing it shredded my heart. It was his to tuck into his pocket and carry along for his glorious climb to superstardom.
    The mayor tapped on the microphone making the speakers beside the makeshift stage squawk. I grimaced, then readied myself for the euphoric haze I experienced whenever Caleb sang. A part of me reveled in the way his raspy voice soothed, pleasured so many. The bleachers shook with the pounding feet and hands along the aluminum planks when Twisted Delirium hit the stage.
    For tonight they’d all returned home.
    Screams, shouts and chants echoed through my ears. A fist wrung my heart when Caleb flashed a smile and swept his gaze across the gathered crowd. “Wow, it looks like everyone in White Bluffs came to welcome us home.”
    The crowd went nuts. My squeezed heart bled a bit deeper. The false hope his words offered drifted within me, evaporating within the toxic stench of reality. Rock stars didn’t do small town life.
    “You know, we played a gig in Austin last night and I have to say I think we love this crowd here a hell of a lot more. None of the success we’ve had would’ve been possible if it hadn’t been for y’all.” He paused, allowing the shouts and applause to thunder through the open space between the bleachers and the