Nine:
Icky vs. the Dangerous Experiment
“Is Rhianico, er, that is, I mean, is the subject prepared, Laurie?”
“Ehnn-yes, Herr Dauktor! Your sister, oops! I mean, the nameless test subject is securely strapped into place on the North shore. The Excoriation device is in perfect alignment to bring utmost muta-trans-bio-atomical disarrangement. I have a nice picnic lunch prepared to enjoy while we watch the process from behind the shielded, protective, blast wall.”
“Excellent, Laurie, I shall just set my automatronic mercenary army on highest alert, just in cast that stupid ToeKey-Oh kid, Jubei-bei face comes snooping around again. I shall order my man-made men to kill Juby-doobie, his ditzy couple friends, and Gumibara on sight!”
“Ehnn-yes, Herr Dauktor! Hunh? Dauktor, listen! I hear a rhythmic thumping coming from the front of the castle!”
buh-dubbity-thump, buh-dubbity-thump
buh-dubbity-dubbity,
thump. thump-thump
buh-dubbity-thump, buh-dubbity-thump
buh-dubbity-dubbity,
thump. thump-thump
“We know you’re here,”
“Your intentions are clear.”
“An Excoriation Detonation,”
“Is what we fear.”
“Bah, be quiet, Gumibara, you are a stupid, and foolish super-monster! Go away before I destroy you forever!”
“Skippity-hoppity-bop!”
“Jiggle-jiggle-jiggle!”
“Hoppity-skippity-bop!”
“Wiggle-wiggle-wiggle!”
“Boppity-hoppity-skip!”
“Giggle-giggle-giggle!”
“Hey Doctor Lionel!”
“Jiggle, jiggle, jiggle.”
“On you, I’m gonna tell.”
“Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle!”
“Somebody ring a bell”
“Giggle, giggle, giggle!
“The Doc’s going straight to gel!”
“Bah, that’s bold talk for a translucent loser like you, Gumibara. I shall never see the inside of your jails! All weapon batteries, stand by! Are you ready, my hydro cannon? Good! How about my electro-caster blasters? Excellent! Are my torpedo launchers prepared for battle? . . . I said, are my torpedo launchers ready?”
“Nnnn-no, Dauktor, that is, the launchers are prepared, but we have not actually finished building our ingenious land torpedos yet.”
“Well, what’s the hold-up?”
“It seems the torpedos require the medium of water to hold them up, Dauktor. The process, alas, does not always work as well on dry land.”
“Bah, I do not need torpedos to defeat that silly bear! Fire on that menace with all available armaments!”
~Tat!~Tat!~Tat!~Tat!~Tat!~Tat!~
“Dauktor, that treacherous bear has deployed a large shield to protect himself!”
“That’s no shield, that’s TiTaupKamaro! Impossible! Those two have joined forces against me? Now I’m really mad! I shall destroy them! The only thing stopping me is that impenetrable shield that TiTaupKamaro walks around in! No matter! Nothing can withstand the barrage that pours down upon it! Those two shall both soon perish!”
“EEEEEEEERNK!!!”
* P*O*P ! *
“Ach! Mein ears! Dauktor Lionelstein, what has happened? All of the automated defenses have shut down!”
“Laurie, don’t you realize? That was an E.M.P. detonation! Someone has released an Electro-Misconstrudelation Pulsation! All of our electro-controlled weapon systems are incapacitated! Only one being is capable of a full charged EMP blast such as that!”
“ EEEERNK! Stand down and call off your ‘ Excoriation Process’ detonation Doctor Lionelstein! You are defeated and Monstrous Island is free once more.”
“TuRuDan, I thought you were dead! You have not been seen in years! You prehistoric fossil, why don’t you mind your own business! You are a throw-back to a time and land forgotten! I am the present and the future! I will not let you stand in my way! You may have disabled my autoclockatons, but your super-screetch had no effect on my internal, neural intero-connected servo-system! My accouterments are immune to your E.M.P. screetch! Ha, ha, you bird-brain, I see you with my, … Evil Eye!”
whuh -brr- bzzzzzck!!!
“EERK! EERK! EERK! I