Free Guardian by Erik Williams Page B

vessels for it to possess after him. Not the most romantic realization. Mike would have preferred something along the lines that he’d changed the monster’s heart, or some shit like that. Maybe he had. It was tough to remember everything Semyaza had said to him, what with all the fear of impending doom and such. In the end, though, Mike was perfectly fine with Semyaza just giving up and going to hell, or wherever he went.
    â€œThat’s right.” Greg flashed his best shit-­eating grin. “Thought you’d seen the last of me, huh?”
    â€œWhen the whole fallen angel thing ended happily, well yeah, I thought I had.”
    â€œSorry to disappoint. And I wouldn’t say it ended happily. A whole hell of a lot of ­people died.”
    â€œPoint taken. Come here to give me more bad news?”
    â€œSomething like that.”
    â€œDon’t tell me there’s another fallen angel loose and wreaking havoc somewhere. I’m having a hard enough time resisting a drink as it is.”
    â€œNo loose angels.” Greg sighed. “At least not yet.”
    â€œWhat the hell does that mean?”
    â€œIt means I don’t know the whole picture. Besides, it’s not important right now.”
    â€œShit, if that’s not important then I’m scared to hear what is.”
    Greg’s face sagged and his eyes softened. “You might have to kill again, Mike.”
    â€œThat’s where you’re wrong. Only in self-­defense from now on. No more assassinations. No more contracts for foreign governments to satisfy Uncle Sam’s IOUs.”
    â€œI understand, but I told you before there would be more.”
    â€œSo, I have to kill to prove you right? I’m not signing up for this bullshit.”
    Greg held up a calming hand. “You’re looking at this all the wrong way.”
    â€œExpand my view of things, then.”
    â€œI’m not here to tell you that you have to kill for the government, Mike, or any other government or even the fucking mob. If it comes to the point where you have to take a life, it will be to protect others. It’s not political or criminal or personal.”
    â€œHorseshit. I just shook the ghosts of those I’ve already killed. Ghosts that clung to me no matter how much I told myself it was all to protect others. I was only able to chase them away when I learned there is a soul and it moves on. That I wasn’t the end for them. Bit easier to deal with when you can think of it that way. And don’t tell me it’s not personal. It’s always personal, unless you’re a fucking psychopath. You know that better than anyone.”
    â€œSo this earthly life isn’t precious because there’s life after death?”
    â€œWhat the fuck are you talking about? Of course this life is precious. I just said it was personal.”
    â€œYou said killing was personal. I concur. You said you were able to chase the ghosts away because the soul continues to exist beyond this realm. I understand how that knowledge would make it easy to deal with. But wouldn’t it also make it easier to kill? I mean, the soul moves on, so who gives a shit about taking a life in the here and now? Maybe it makes you easier to become a psychopath. Unless you think this life is precious. But how can this life of transient meat be precious if the soul moves on?”
    â€œBut . . .”
    â€œBut what?”
    â€œI . . .” Mike couldn’t think of a single thing to say. He’d felt better after talking to Semyaza. He thought it didn’t matter how many he’d killed because there was something more. Something beyond this reality. But now he couldn’t say that was true. He started to feel the weight of the dead on his shoulders once more.
    â€œWondering why you feel like shit?” Greg asked.
    â€œSort of.”
    â€œIt’s because this life is precious. Every moment of it. Sure,