Free High-Caliber Concealer by Bethany Maines

a week, and have that someone new be a European
rock star. I’m telling you, it was the break-up trifecta and you
blew it.” Jenny shook her head sadly. “Anyway, my point is that the
problem isn’t knowing what to do. You know what you should do. You
just don’t want to do it.”
    “You really think I should break up with
him?” asked Nikki and watched Jenny and Jane exchange glances
filled with the telepathy of previous conversations.
    “Yes,” said Jenny, taking a deep breath. “I
do. He’s a threat to Carrie Mae and to you, and the only way that
you’re making this work is because he’s never around, which is
making you miserable.”
    Nikki looked at Jane, who nodded and then
smiled apologetically. “Ellen feels the same way, I suppose?”
    “I’m sure I couldn’t answer that,” said
Jenny, who had clearly been spending time with Mr. Merrivel, “as we
do not speak about you behind your back.”
    Nikki laughed and threw one of the fortune
cookies at her. “Yes, you do. Behind my back, in front of my back,
beside my back.”
    “Well, there’s more of us,” said Jane,
practically. “We have you surrounded. What are you going to do on
your leave?”
    “I’m going to drive up and see my
grandmother in Kaniksu Falls,” said Nikki.
    “That should be fun. You’ve been saying you
need to visit her,” said Jenny scooping some white rice out of her
dish and into Jane’s container.
    “It’s rice,” said Jane rolling her eyes.
“You can eat rice.”
    “It’s white rice. It’s devoid of
nutrients.”
    “It should be nice to visit,” said Nikki,
ignoring the dietary squabble. “But I think she’s going to ask if I
want to buy the farm.”
    “She’s going to ask if you want to die?”
Jenny looked up, startled.
    “What?” They stared at each other trying to
figure out where the conversation had gone wrong. “No, she owns a
farm. I think she’s starting to feel too old to take care of it,
and she’s thinking about selling.”
    “Oh, right. Yeah, we had to work that out
with my Granny. We were all so sad the day we had to take her cows
away.”
    “I don’t know what you have to do to get
your cow license revoked,” said Jane. “And it’s possible,
considering how deeply Southern you are, that I don’t want to
know.”
    “That is a slander on my heritage and my
Granny,” said Jenny. “You’d better watch yourself young lady or I
will not teach you how to get free drinks in Cancun.”
    “I know how to get free drinks,” said Jane.
“I just have higher standards for my breasts.”
    “Ladies,” said Nikki, “before this turns
into a fistfight, can we focus on the really important
question?”
    “Sure,” said Jenny, “What is the really
important question? Is Z’ev getting suspicious?”
    “What?” Nikki laughed casually. “No, I was
going to say, chocolate syrup or berries on the ice cream?”
    Jane’s phone let out a chirp and she picked
it up to read the incoming text.
    “Can I have all of them?” asked Jane,
setting the phone down. “That was the office letting me know that
my mainframe access has been suspended for the next two weeks. This
sucks, guys! I don’t want to be on unpaid leave. It goes on our
permanent record. It’s not fair.”
    Jenny leaned over to give her a hug. “I had
to turn in Freddy.”
    Nikki winced in sympathy. “I’m sorry,
Jenny.”
    “It’s OK,” said Jenny, straightening her
spine and putting on an obviously brave face. “We did the crime; I
can do the time. Besides, I couldn’t take an M-16 to Cancun
anyway.”
     

August
IV
The Cantina Band
Kaniksu Falls • Tuesday
    Nikki paused at the four-way stop,
considering her options. The problem with taking a road trip to
find oneself was that she wasn’t really lost and now she had
arrived in Kaniksu Falls and was heartily sick of the company, but
still no closer to any decisions. It was 7:30 p.m. on a Tuesday,
which meant that her grandmother would be firmly ensconced at the
Bingo