Free Knight of Her Heart (Conquering the Heart) by Alyssa James

tore her eyes away from his as she fought to swallow down on the guilty sob which threatened to burst from her lips.
    Far from being reassured, Lisette’s emotions seethed in the turmoil of inner conflict. On her own private inner battlefield, a yearning to be wed to this fierce, noble warrior waged war with her guilty conscience.
    Nay! Her brain screamed. ’Tis so wrong. He attempts to calm me when he has no knowledge of the terrible injustice I have unwittingly wrought upon him.
    The priest re-commenced the wedding ceremony. When he reached the words that asked if anyone had just cause why they should not wed, Lisette felt faint.
    Confess! Her conscience berated her. In all the wrong you have done, at least do this much that is right!
    She half-expected someone to step forward and denounce her. Ysabel must feel equally as guilty to keep her silence when she knew of just cause as to why this union should not proceed. Thankfully John and Frederick had not accompanied the party that travelled to Collins’ keep but had stayed behind at Bridlemere. But here or not, what she had done had surely cursed all of them by making them privy to her crime.
    Inwardly, she berated herself for her lack of courage. Honour demanded that she denounce herself, and yet she could find no voice as her tongue stuck to the roof of her dry mouth.  Shame churned her gut. The image of the priest blurred, causing her to blink rapidly to clear her vision. Her heavy limbs swayed and it took every ounce of her strength to keep herself upright.
    The priest was solemn. “I require and charge you both, as ye will answer at the dreadful day of judgment when the secrets of all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you know any impediment why ye may not be lawfully joined together in Matrimony, that ye confess it. For ye be well assured, that so many as be coupled together otherwise than God’s Word doth allow are not joined together by God, neither is their Matrimony lawful.”
    Lisette trembled in earnest as though she had been plunged into a cold river. Each of the priest’s words was like a millstone around her neck, weighing down on her conscience—sinking her into deeper despair so she was drowning in a fast flowing tide of her sins and could not breathe.
    “My Lady, are you well?” Lord Romsey’s deep voice broke through her thoughts as she struggled for each shallow breath. His left armour-clad arm went around her waist to support her. “You are faint?”
    Speech was not possible. All she could do was incline her head slightly as she fought to control her breathing.
    “All will be well, Lady Lisette,” the Earl of Romsey told her in hushed tones. “I vow upon my life that I will take care of you and honour you as my wife.”
    Oh, Dear Lord. His words only made her feel worse—just twisted the dagger a little further into her sickened stomach and pulled more thread from the frayed edges of her conscience. The knowledge that he was so chivalrous and she was now so immoral by the one shocking deed she had perpetrated, caused her an agony of anguish.
    Guilt threatened to overcome her. Only a week ago she would surely have made this man a good wife.
    Why, oh why had she taken things into her own hands?She should have trusted in God to right this situation for her in His own way.She would surely repent her actions for ever more. She had failed in her faith. Her prayers had been answered but she had been too impatient to wait for God’s response. Instead she had deceived herself being convinced that she had only one option available to her that did not involve murder.
    Confess now! Her conscience shrieked.
    Confession could have her sentenced to death. What would become of Genevieve then?
    The church would surely punish her servants for aiding her in her wickedness. And what of the peasant man she’d used? Would the church torture John and Frederick to learn his identity and then punish that innocent man as well?
    Nay. She could not