Free Come and Join the Dance by Joyce Johnson

university.”
    â€œIs that true?”
    â€œYes,” he said. “It’s true. Five black folders. You’re terribly curious, aren’t you? Would you like to see them?”
    â€œNo,” she said, retreating uncomfortably, “I wouldn’t.”
    â€œWhy not?”
    â€œWell … I just think that dreams should be private.”
    â€œWhat else do you think, Susan?” Peter asked relentlessly.
    â€œWhat do you mean?”
    â€œWhat do you think about me, for example?”
    She began to feel frightened, as if at any minute she were going to find herself standing naked in front of him, yet she wanted him to go on, wanted the pain of it.
    â€œThe way you stare when you’re not talking is very mysterious. What are you looking at? Are you seeing everything? Digging everything? Or do you see nothing at all?”
    â€œSometimes … nothing,” she whispered, her face burning.
    â€œWell, Susan, I got very drunk last night and called you. Kay knows.”
    Kay was a white blur across the table. Susan had to force herself to speak. “I’m glad I wasn’t in.”
    Peter laughed too quickly.
    â€œSay, Susan, we should go to the museum,” Anthony said.
    â€œI’ll drive you downtown,” said Peter.
    Anthony seemed puzzled. “Oh, we can get there… . And you have that fellowship thing… . ”
    â€œIt’s late, Peter!” Kay cried.
    â€œI can’t get it done. It has to be in at five. There wouldn’t even be time to type it.”
    â€œI’ll type it for you,” Kay said wearily. “I won’t go to work.”
    â€œI don’t want any favors, Kay. I can’t get it done. I can’t just sit down and write it carelessly now.”
    â€œYou’ve got three hours, Peter. You could try.”
    â€œI’ll try again in the fall,” he said brusquely. “It comes up again in the fall.” He got up from the table and turned to Anthony. “Come on,” he said. “I’ll drive you. Maybe we’ll all just go for a drive and have a beer somewhere. It’s a good day for that.”
    â€œWell … all right,” Anthony said dubiously. “You’ll come?” he asked Susan.
    Susan avoided Peter’s eyes. She knew if she said she wouldn’t come, he might go back to his apartment, he might even fill out the application. They were all waiting for her to answer.
    It was a good day for a drive, she thought. Broadway was full of sun and cars and racing children. She wanted to be set in motion too, to run mindlessly and not feel too much. She couldn’t do what Kay would have done. She was herself. She wanted to be saved from boredom even for a few hours. “I guess I’ll come,” she said.
    â€œLet’s go and find the car,” Peter said to Anthony.
    She watched them go up Broadway. A sprinkler truck groaned by, spraying the streets, and she saw them step back on the sidewalk a moment too late to escape the wave of wet mist. Peter wiped his face. It seemed very funny. “Peter got wet,” she said to Kay. When she looked out of the window again, she had lost them. “I wonder if he remembers where he parked the car. He seems terribly inefficient.” Kay still had said nothing. “You’re coming with us, Kay, aren’t you?”
    â€œI have to go to work.”
    â€œOh … I always forget that you’re not in school.” She watched Kay stub out her cigarette and take another one from the pack. “What’s the matter, Kay? What’s happened?” she asked, even though she knew, they both knew. Kay’s face was blank. “I mean, are you angry with me?”
    â€œAngry? No. I’m not angry.” Kay’s dark eyes narrowed, trying to focus. “I think I will go on the drive,” she said abruptly. “I don’t feel much like working. Sometimes it’s like being buried alive