Free The Midwife of St. Petersburg by Linda Lee Chaikin

her gaze from his. She wasn’t about to take the bait and inquire what he
did
mean.
    “My cousin Tatiana, your fiancée, is exceedingly jealous of you,” she stated. “I’m afraid even this one waltz will upset her.”
    “I am not officially engaged to her. Nor have I vowed my love and commitment. She’s assumed as much because she wants it that way.”
    “And you do not?”
    “I have my reasons for going with the tide. I admit the engagement is expected—by her and, more importantly, by General Roskov. Still, I’m not a prisoner unless I decide it’s what I want.”
    “Is it his expectations, then, that mean more to you than Tatiana’s?”
    “I’ve cooperated this past year with all of their expectations for reasons of my own. No one twisted my arm about Tatiana. Nor am I easily pressed into a marriage I don’t think will benefit my plans. Perhaps I am shocking you? I’m sorry, but I’m speaking the facts—hard, cold, and true. Would you care to hear the rest of my confession, Miss Peshkova?”
    No, I would not
. She was dazed by his blunt assessment. Her emotions were in brutal conflict. In one heartbeat she had hoped he did not love Tatiana, and in the next, she was offended that he would consider marriage when he did not.
    “No, it does not concern me, Colonel.”
    “Oh, but it does, and I’m sure you realize it.”
    She kept silent but felt herself blushing.
    “I shall confess, regardless,” he said. “I’ve considered marriage to the general’s daughter because she
is
the general’s daughter. He can further my career in the military in the years to come.”
    She looked at him, trying to meet his warm, brittle gaze with a steadiness that matched his own. “I didn’t take you for such a callous man, Colonel Kronstadt.”
    “Callous?”
    “Well, I can only think that a man who’d marry a woman he wasn’t in love with for military advancement must be wretchedly cold-hearted.”
    “And terribly unfair to your sensitive cousin.”
    “Yes, that too.”
    A crooked smile lifted his mouth. “Anything else?”
    “Need I say more? The music is ending, and I think we’d best conclude our conversation.”
    “Without knowing why your poor cousin is willing to marry such a wretchedly cold man?”
    “Well, it’s all quite obvious, isn’t it? You’ve deceived her. She’s in love with you, and you’ve taken advantage of her. She has my sympathy.”
    His mouth tipped at one corner. “She is not the one who is beguiled. I think you should know why your cousin so wishes to marry me.”
    “It’s none of my concern,” she said loftily.
    “Nevertheless, I’ve begun an explanation and would like to finish it, please.”
    She looked at him mutely. This was her first meeting with him that had romantic potential, and it had turned into a battleground. Idealistic thoughts had come crashing down upon her. The dashing Colonel Kronstadt was a cool, arrogant cad.
    And yet—despite this realization, she was surprised with herself for continuing to talk with him.
Have I gone mad since I stepped off the steamer?
    “General Viktor wishes our marriage. He’s told his daughter that if she doesn’t agree to marry me, the Roskov wealth—which, as you probably know, is considerable—will not be left to her discretion. It will be dribbled out in small annual amounts that she considers the wages of the poor. So you see, the marriage is an arranged affair for both of us. She’s no more in love with me than I am with her.”
    “Tatiana
is
in love with you. She’s green with jealousy whenever you look at another woman.”
    “It’s jealousy over a fortune she fears could slip through her fingers.”
    “I think all of this is dreadful—”
    “You know as well as I that arranged marriages are as old as the Bible.”
    “Arranged marriages are common, but it’s not something I wish for
my
future—” She stopped abruptly as Ilya came to mind. Ilya Jilinsky, the young man her father wished her to marry.