Free Till We Rise by Camila Cher Harmath

he is proud of what he has just said.
    "You are weird," I say "But I like it." I feel partially uncomfortable right now, indeed, I have just confessed that I like him. Well, I did not say literally I like you but it’s the same to me. I like something about him and that means I like him or at least like ONE thing about him. Okay, I need to be honest with myself; I like him a lot, end point. I should stop thinking about liking this guy because maybe it’s showing and he already knows how much I crave him.
    "Do you?" he asks several seconds later.
    WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO ANSWER?
    "I mean... Do you mind if I call you Lypso?" Theo adds.
    Oh my God, thank you.
    "I prefer Calypso. Nevertheless, I told you that you could call me whatever you wanted to," I try to sound calmed and not like those annoying bitches that remember every little detail of everything, in fact, I am one of those  but I want to pretend that I am not.
    "I don't want to bother you," he asserts, making a nice grin that I have seen before but don't know what it's supposed to mean. Is he serious? Is he joking? I will never know.
    "Theo, you don't bother me," I take a look at his face and try to figure out what's going on inside that little head of his. "The last thing you do is annoy me," I give up, I don't know what he is thinking, I wish I had some of those powers to read people’s minds, that would be cool, except for the fact that I would be able to know how much of a failure I am, because people think a lot and they are cruel.
    "Why are you so nice to me?" Theodore interrupts my deep thoughts.
    "What?" I directly answer his question, he is the one who is nice with everybody and I am not. "What do you mean?" I add afterwards.
    "You are absolutely nice to me," he repeats "I mean, I was sad and you tried to console me and that's so nice from you," he adds intertwining his fingers, looking charming. "Also, you bring me food, now you are taking me back to college. Besides, you had an argument with your best friend because of me and you're still he—"
    "It was not because of you," I reject his response. It was definitely not about him, something is wrong with Roth and it has nothing to do with me or with Theo.
    "Yes, he was mad at me because he likes you." He says lowering his voice.
    "What?" I ask "WHAT?" I repeat "Ew, no." Just the thought about it makes me sick. God, Roth, no.
    "Yeah, the way he looks at you," he keeps speaking like if he is murmuring shyly.
    "He is my friend," I affirm, crossing my both arms and taking a deep breath. I can’t even think about having something more than a friendship with him. Why is Theodore capable of thinking about it? He genuinely did not realize that I am so into him yet.
    "But that doesn't mean he can't be in love with you," he seems a little bit sad and confused, I don’t know if this is right or wrong. Maybe I should feel special because he is feeling low about Roth liking me.
    "He is not, Theodore" I laugh because I don’t know what to do, as always.
    "I bet he is" He challenges me.
    "No, please" He doesn’t realize that there’s no chance that Roth can look at me that way. He barely cares about me as a friend and he doesn’t even think that I am pretty or something of the sort.
    "What's wrong with it, Calyp—?"
    "He's gay," I interrupt him.
    "I didn't see that coming," his face changes completely, he is now smiling like a little kid, as if I had told him that we are going to Disneyland.
    "Oh my god, I am such an idiot," I start screaming and regretting what I have just said. "Oh no, I screw everything up." I press my face into my hands, nodding and sighing.
    "It's okay, I won't tell anyone. I can forget about it," Theo says while caressing my right cheek with his soft and gentle hand.
    "Can we just don't talk ever again about this?" I ask him with a tone of regret. I hate myself and I don't understand why I always end up screwing everything.
    "About what?" He says curious, pulling a face that shows