Free Incendiary by Chris Cleave

knee and a broken hand but the doctors said it was my internal injuries meant I wasn’t going anywhere for a while. So I lay there day after day watching the relatives coming on to the ward to visit their loved ones. Some of the relatives looked happy when they visited but some of them were heavy with sadness and you could tell their next visit was a grave. Then there was a third kind of visitor and they were the unhappiest of all because they weren’t visiting anyone in particular. They were looking for a relative that was listed missing. They came like ghosts outside normal visiting hours and their eyes stared very hard at each of us ladies on the ward. You could see them patiently trying to turn our faces into the ones they were missing. Even through all the painkillers it made me cry Osama I would of given anything to look like their missing relative just for 1 second just to give us all a moment’s hope.
    The day they told me my husband and my boy were definitely dead was the day Prince William came to visit. The nurses were excited. They ran up and down the ward changing our sheets. Men in suits came with mirrors on sticks. They went along the whole ward looking under our beds for bombs. A photographer came and he put a gadget up to my face.
    —What’s that?
    —It’s a light meter madam, he said. You’re too pale.
    —My husband and my boy are missing. You’d be pale too.
    The photographer ignored me.
    —Please can you get this one some makeup? he said.
    A leggy girl came over. She had a long plastic case like the box my husband used to keep his fishing tackle in. She put it down on my bed and opened it up. There was a whole makeup studio in there. She gave me some foundation and then she did my eyes and my lips.
    —There, she said. You look lovely. Fit for a prince.
    Now 2 men on ropes came down the outside of the building. They washed the windows so clean you couldn’t tell they were there. A doctor wheeled in some big shiny medical contraptions with lots of flashing lights. He put one next to each of the beds on the ward. When he plugged in the machine next to my bed I propped myself up on my elbow to look at it. The doctor blinked at me.
    —What does that do?
    —It shows that the NHS is fully equipped for the 21st century, he said.
    —Are you going to connect me to it?
    —Not unless you’re planning on having renal failure, he said. It’s a kidney dialysis machine.
    The doctor nodded at me and went off to install the next machine at the next bed. The nurses were frantic by now. They kept popping off to the night station to do their own makeup. They forgot to give us our painkillers. 4 coppers in uniform came on the ward. They stood by the doors. They had curly wires going into their ears. Their eyes were all over the place. Everyone went quiet. Now we were just waiting for Prince William. Then a woman came. She walked straight over to my bed with everyone’s eyes following her. This woman wasn’t a doctor or a nurse. She was wearing an ordinary tweed suit it made me nervous. She pulled the modesty curtain around my bed.
    —Hello there, she said.
    —What are you pulling that curtain for?
    —Well, she said. I’m doing it because I have some news I’m afraid. I thought you might appreciate a little privacy.
    —Is it my husband and my boy? Have you found which hospital they’re in?
    The woman shook her head. She was middle-aged. 50 maybe or 60. She looked like she hadn’t slept in days.
    —They’re not in any hospital, she said.
    —Well then. Just tell me where they are. I’m nearly better. I should think the doctors will let me go home soon. My boy’ll be missing me and I bet he’s not eating properly. I mean he’s a good eater but you have to cook his greens just right or he won’t touch them. Kids eh?
    I laughed but the woman didn’t. She just looked at the floor. She swallowed. She looked back up at me. Now she looked 500 or maybe 600 years old.
    —I’m very sorry, she said.