Free PUCKED Up by Helena Hunting

friend Lily, who hates me, told her she should be careful about dating me.
    Sunny wasn’t all that concerned at first. She’s a free spirit. She liked my aura, and that was enough for her. Then reality smacked her in the face like an unwashed dick. And the pictures in the media have kept happening, but not because I’m taking girls home—I’m not. I just don’t want to be rude to my fans.
    Unfortunately a lot of my fans happen to be women who dress slutty.
    I need to find a way to convince Sunny I’m not full of shit. It’s gonna be a challenge.
    Sunny sighs. “How do I know you weren’t joining the Kilometer-High Club in the airplane bathroom with some hooker bunny?”
    “ I didn’t even use the bathroom on the plane. They’re disgusting. I try to go before I get on.”
    “ So maybe you waited until after you got off the plane. Maybe you did it in the rental car. Maybe you stopped at her house on the way here. And then maybe you had a shower so I wouldn’t suspect anything and then had sex again in the shower with her, and I bet she gave you her number and—”
    “ Who are you talking about? Is there some rumor or something that I don’t know about? I didn’t meet any bunnies on the plane. No one even sat beside me, and the flight attendant was a dude.”
    Sunny throws up her hands. “I’m being hypotheatrical.”
    “ Do you mean hypothetical?”
    “ Don’t put words in my mouth! Didn’t you land around eleven? You were supposed to be here hours ago, even with your missed flight. How do I know you actually missed the flight in the first place?”
    “ You can ask Violet. She dropped me off at the airport.”
    She crosses her arms over her chest. “Pfft. How do I know she wouldn’t lie for you?”
    “ There’s no way in hell Vi would lie for me, especially about something like that.”
    She gives me an incredulous look. “You forgot you were coming to see me!”
    “ I didn’t forget. I got the flight times wrong.”
    Her cute little chin starts to tremble. I’ve seen this happen before. Not with Sunny, but with Vi. I think it means she’s going to cry. Up until now, I haven’t seen tears, and I’m not sure how to deal with them. With Vi I usually get her a dairy treat, and we play violent video games until her lactose intolerance gives her stomach cramps and she makes me leave so she can hole herself up in the bathroom and let the terror rain down. Sunny doesn’t play video games, and she doesn’t eat dairy, so that’s out.
    “ How do I know you didn’t stop at a frat dorm tonight and you’re using autocorrect as an excuse? You do that a lot, you know.”
    “ You also know I suck with spelling.”
    “ That’s not the real issue, and you know it.”
    I sigh and drop my head to her knee. Her skin is soft and warm, and it smells like her name. Or what I think sunshine would smell like if it were something I could actually smell. Her whole body tenses. After a few seconds she runs her fingers through my hair. I totally get why dogs love to be scratched behind their ears. I forget there’s a question and rub my cheek on her leg.
    Her fingers curl at the crown of my head, and she lifts me by my hair. Her normally soft green eyes are hard.
    “ What am I supposed to believe, Miller?”
    “ I’m sorry about the pictures. I wasn’t even awake for the dickface ones, so you can’t really be mad about those.”
    “ But you were naked.”
    “ I can’t sleep with clothes on.”
    “ You were at Lance’s house. And there were hooker bunnies!”
    “ I’ll wear boxers to bed when I stay at Lance’s from now on.”
    “ Boxers aren’t going to solve the problem. I don’t know why you have to stay at his place at all. It’s, like, a twenty-minute drive to your place, isn’t it?”
    I don’t know how she knows this. Sunny’s never been to my place, or Lance’s. Sometimes we talk on the phone while I’m driving there, so maybe that explains it. It’s not important now, though.
    “