minutes lateâsome of the children are much later than that, and we seem to get along all right. It is very kind of you to write notes of explanation, but please do not trouble yourself.
I look forward to meeting you at the parent-teacher night later this year, when we can discuss Cassie properly. She certainly does seem to have a good heart, and is quite popular. (I often see other children gathered around her while she entertains them with funny storiesâI wonder what she tells them!)
Best Wishes,
Cath Murphy
Turning into her driveway one day, Fancy looked across at her neighborâs veranda and saw that there were two of them. Her neighbor had become two.
She got out of her car, and glanced over quickly. Yes, there were now two men sitting at the breakfast table, slicing up kiwifruit, sipping from their coffee mugs. She kept her back straight, and hurried across the burning driveway to the soft, cool grass. She never wore shoes to drive.
ââso he ate his own arm,â she heard from the porch next door, just as she reached her front door. And then a chuckle.
She couldnât help it. She turned and stared.
âFancy,â said her neighbor, âhello there. This is my brother, Bill. Heâs out from Canada for a couple of days. Bill. Meet Fancy.â
âDid I startle you?â said Bill-the-brother with a friendly nod. âYou heard what I just said? He ate his own arm?â
How direct the Canadians were. âWellâ¦â she began.
âItâs what happened to a guy I know,â he explained. Meanwhile, Fancyâs neighbor looked down, slicing up another kiwifruit. âYou want to hear the story? Okay. My buddyâs hiking in the Rockies up Jasper way; he stops to take a picture of some plant or other; somehow he crouches down by a cougar trap; he gets his arm caught in the cougar trap. I mean, seriously caught. Next thing, dumb effin luck, a big mother of a bear comes along and takes a bite out of his leg. Seriously, a bite out of his leg. Heâs screaming and punching it with his one unstuck arm, but nothing he can do. The bear goes off but he knows, he can just tell, that itâs coming back later to finish him off. But he canât get out of the trap! I mean, his arm is completely stuck! Youâre in that predicament, what are you going to do?â
Fancy tilted her head to the side. âWhat are you going to do?â she asked.
âYouâre going to chew through your own arm.â
Bill-the-brother nodded to himself and picked up a slice of kiwifruit. âThatâs what my buddy did,â he said, green juice dripping down his chin. âHe ate through his arm and got away.â
Fancy stared.
Her neighbor offered her a cup of coffee.
âNo, thank you. And thank you for the story, Bill. Nice to meet you.â
She opened the screen door to her house, and it let out a long, thin squeal.
Dear Ms. Murphy,
How kind of you to write! I, also, look forward to meeting you at the parent-teacher night.
Iâm so pleased to hear that Cassie is popular! I hope she does not give you any trouble.
You know, I just thought I would let you know that I was talking to Barbara Coulton the other dayâshe is Lucindaâs motherâand she told me that Lucinda is happier than sheâs ever been at school! Barbara is delighted with the standard and variety of work that Lucinda brings home, and is especially pleased that you correct Lucindaâs spelling mistakesâsuch a rare thing in modern teaching.
Take care, and best wishes!
Fancy Zing
âWrite this down,â Fancy said to Radcliffe on Sunday afternoon: â Toilet paper. â Radcliffe wrote it down. âFollow me down the hall,â she instructed, taking out the vacuum cleaner from the hall closet. Obediently, Radcliffe followed, writing the list.
âThe vacuum cleanerâs broken, you know.â
âI donât want the vacuum cleaner,â