Free aterovis_bleedinghearts.pm6 by Arlene Chance Page A

time. They stopped when they saw who I was, you know. They were gonna kill me too, but when they sat up and saw me more clearly, they said ‘Shit’, jumped up and ran. They recognized me.”
    Asher sat back onto the floor. “You’re kidding,” he whispered.
    I shook my head. “I wish I was,” I said.
    “That’s scary, Kill, but that doesn’t mean he was killed because he was gay. Maybe the mugger knew you.”
    “I’ve been thinking a lot about this, Asher, and I don’t think it was just a mugger. I was there, remember? Call it intuition, call it a hunch…I don’t know what it is exactly, I just know in my heart that it wasn’t a random mugging.”
    Asher sat in silence for a minute, then got back up on his knees and reached for the bandage. “If you’ve thought so much about it, who do you think it was?”
    “I don’t know,” I told him, “I hadn’t really thought about that part of it yet.”
    “Well, arms up then,” he said, and as soon as I’d complied he started wrapping me up again.
    While he wrapped I thought about his question. Who could it have been? I was surprised I hadn’t thought about this before. I felt kind of dumb actually. Isn’t that the obvious first question? But as I began to think about it I realized that maybe I just hadn’t wanted to think about it. The first person that popped into my mind was Zack. I thought about his threat earlier that same day.
    He had said that I’d be sorry; me and my boyfriend, and we all knew he meant Seth. Then I thought of Asher and his words that day last week in this same room, “If he hurt you, I’ll kill him.” Immediately, my body stiff-ened involuntarily.
    Asher noticed right away, “What? Did I hurt you?”
    he asked me.
    70

    Bleeding Hearts
    “No, its nothing,” I said, then, “Can I ask you a question?”
    “Sure, Kill, you know you can ask me anything.”
    “Asher, why are you being so nice to me all of a sudden?”
    He didn’t answer at first. He just finished up the bandaging job and then sat back on his heels, leaving his hands still resting lightly on my sides, his eyes turned down, not looking at me.
    “I told you before,” he said.
    “Tell me again,” I insisted.
    He took a deep breath. “When I thought I was losing you as a friend to Seth, I realized how much you meant to me. When you started acting so different, I wasn’t sure what was going on. You were always snapping at people and getting mad and yelling. It wasn’t like you, so I got worried.” He looked up to see if I was listening, then, quickly looking away again, he continued. “I didn’t really like what Zack and Jesse were saying and all, but it was just easier to go along with them. But then when you got hurt, almost killed, it really scared me. I realized that I had almost lost you...er...lost the chance to tell you...I mean...”
    “Tell me what?” I asked softly.
    He sat there for a second then looked back up at me.
    Our eyes locked.
    “Did you love Seth?” he asked me.
    “What?” I gasped.
    Then he leaned forward onto his knees again and kissed me softly on the lips.
    Time seemed to slow down when Asher kissed me.
    In the few seconds that our lips were pressed together I had a whole conversation in my head.
    “Does this mean that Asher is gay? Well, duh! Straight guys do not generally kiss their friends on the lips like this. Not unless they are in the Mafia and I’m pretty 71

    JOSH ATEROVIS
    sure Asher isn’t — his dad maybe, but not Asher. But then why didn’t he ever tell me? Maybe for the same reason I didn’t. But then again, I didn’t know until last week really. Oh, who am I kidding? I’ve always known in my heart. Nothing has ever felt more right than Asher kissing me. Wait a minute! Asher is kissing me!”
    With that last thought, I jerked back and stared at Asher wide-eyed. He slowly sat back on his heels and looked up at me. I could read in his eyes the fear of rejection and the depth of his feelings. For a long time neither of us spoke. Finally I pulled myself together.
    “Why did you kiss