Free Deja Vu by Michal Hartstein

stood next to me, folded his arms, leaned on his desk and said calmly, “I apologize. Maybe I overreacted a little, but you really made me very angry. I do want you to come to me when you have a problem and not bottle things up, but I also expect you to use your discretion - and you absolutely did not use it today.” I nodded in agreement, even though I still thought I was right. “I’m very happy with you and your work, and I believe you can have a great future in this company. I’m also sure that, if you keep at it, your wages will go up, but all in good time.”
    I left the room. Rina, his secretary, couldn’t fail to miss my red eyes and immediately picked up her phone and dialed, probably to announce the hot gossip to one of my bookkeepers. I didn’t want to let the story escalate, and I left the building. Across the road was a small café. I sat down and ordered a cup of coffee. I drank it slowly, to calm down and let the tears stop before I went back to the office. I thought to myself that maybe I did over exaggerate and some of my demands were not legitimate after only a year with the company, but Gideon's reaction blew me away. I was really offended. Is a request for a higher salary reason enough to threaten an employee with dismissal? I was sure it wasn’t. If I hadn’t needed the job and the salary, I’d have gone right up there and collected my things. 
    When I got home and cried into Amir’s shoulder, he was forced to agree with me that Gideon's response was a bit extreme. However, he reminded me that he thought I should wait patiently until at least the end of my second year with Smart Green, and he also thought that I should stop making comparisons between the employees, but compare my salary with that of colleagues in other companies.
    “But I’m the chief bookkeeper, not an accountant,” I said tearfully.
    “Tell me,” Amir said quietly, stroking me softly. “Is there anything you’re missing?”
    “Yeah, I’m not an accountant!” I answered immediately with bitterness.
    “Let the title go,” he said almost angrily and then returned to speaking calmly. “I mean do you lack for anything?”
    “I could use more money...”
    “I don’t lack for anything. We do pretty well for our age. We both have stable jobs, and I think you enjoy your work very much. How many people can say that?”
    “I don’t know,” I shrugged. I didn’t like the logic in Amir’s words. I wanted to wallow in self-pity.
    “Not many, I assure you. You do this to yourself all the time, Rose. You compare yourself with others instead of focusing on what you have. Stop imagining others have it better all the time, and start enjoying and appreciating what you do have.”
    He was right. But it was hard for me to get off my high horse. I’d been up there for so long. I found it hard to get my feet back on the ground.

CHAPTER 7
     
     
    Four months after Adi, Inbal and David’s second daughter, was born, Daria and Asi also had a daughter, Shira. According to my calculations, Daria became pregnant immediately after Inbal announced her second pregnancy. Like always, she didn’t want to be left behind.
    Daria didn’t miss the chance to flaunt her wealth and the fact that she’d managed to get back in shape in less than two months, so she organized a lavish party to show off the baby and her figure. After Inbal and I finished admiring her remarkable weight loss, her revealing dress and the flashy pink decorations of the venue, she led us to our tables, but not before she had us swear to “try everything” from the buffet, although we had no doubt that she wouldn’t put even one grain of rice in her own mouth. We couldn’t sit quietly for more than two minutes: David and Amir were busy chasing Nofar and little Coral while Inbal and I couldn’t exchange even one sentence without baby Adi bothering us. When Adi began to scream incessantly, our fragmented conversation ended officially, and