Free Deja Vu by Michal Hartstein Page A

Inbal took Adi out to calm her down. I sat and played listlessly with my iPhone.
    “Didn’t you study accounting at the University of Tel Aviv?” the girl sitting across the table asked me in a cautious tone.
    “Yes,” I replied, looking up. She seemed familiar to me.
    “I knew I recognized you!” She smiled a satisfied smile. “My husband and I also did accounting in Tel Aviv. Maybe you know my husband? He’s just running around after Guy, our son. When did you graduate?”
    “I graduated in 2004, but then I did an extra year. How about you?”
    “Lior graduated in 2002, and I finished up in 2003. I think we did a course together… perhaps it was Managerial Accountancy?”
    “Maybe. You finished your extra year or your degree in 2003?”
    “I didn’t complete the extra year.” She rose from her chair and moved to sit next to me. “I'm not a CPA.”
    “Really?”
    “I did a degree in law and accounting, and I chose to specialize in law.”
    “So you’re a lawyer?”
    “Yes, both of us are.”
    “Oh. I studied economics and accounting and specialized in accounting.”
    “Lior and I debated the matter and in the end we chose to specialize in law, but I don’t regret it.”
    “I don’t regret my choice either,” I said.  In truth I wasn’t sure whether I did or not, though I hadn’t had the option to specialize in law.
    “We didn’t throw away our accounting studies.” She smiled. “After I finished my internship, we went to New York for a year and got our master’s in management, so it was very helpful.”
    “Very nice,” I said, feeling a green cloud of jealousy began to hover over me.
    “How do you know Daria?” she inquired.
    “We're childhood friends. How about you?”
    “My son’s in the same kindergarten as Roy.”
    “So you live i n Daria and Asi’s neighborhood?”
    “Just two buildings over,” she said. She spotted Lior from afar and signaled him over. “Lior, you remember...” She looked at me and she remembered that she’d forgotten to ask my name.
    “Rose Yanku. Actually, in school I was still Rose Lerner.”
    “Rose Lerner,” she finished the sentence.
    Lior approached, a golden-haired boy bundled up in his hands. “Hello,” he smiled at me. He looked at me and smiled sheepishly. “The truth is, I don’t really remember you.”
    I didn’t recognize him either.
    “Rose studied a year below me and two below you, maybe that's why.”
    The blond child didn’t let Lior join the conversation, and we were left alone again.
    “How many children do you have?” she asked.
    “One daughter.” I pointed out Nofar, who was watching a clown modeling balloons with interest. “Nofar.”
    “We also have only one child,” she said sadly. “Excuse me for asking, but do you have problems?”
    “What problems?”
    “You know...” she stammered, “fertility problems...”
    “Why?” I looked at her, stunned, “I’m only thirty, and I have one child already.”
    “Oh, sorry,” she said, embarrassed. “She just seems to be a big girl and you don’t look at all pregnant,” she tried to flatter me.
    “I don’t understand,” I said. I was confused by her slightly embarrassing questions.
    “Forgive me,” she said, and I saw that she was on the verge of tears. “It’s just that almost everyone I know is having their second child.”
    “So?” I asked nonchalantly, as if I never compared myself to others. “Just because everyone has another child, I need to as well?”
    “Absolutely not,” she smiled and blew her nose. “If I didn’t really want another baby, it wouldn’t bother me at all.” I looked at her with empathy. I knew how she felt. I’d never longed for another child, but I knew how it felt to not get what you want. In recent years, I always felt like I was chasing happiness and yet always unable to attain it.
    “You must forgive me,” she said. “I barely know you, and here I am dumping all my troubles on you.”
    “It's okay,”