Free Hounded to Death by Laurien Berenson

said Richard. “But it wouldn’t have hurt if she’d given Margo a hint ahead of time about what Charles was planning to do. I thought those two women were supposed to be friends.”
    â€œWomen friends,” said Derek. “Now, there’s an oxymoron for you.”
    Tubby looked up from his drink and grinned.
    â€œExcuse me?” I said.
    â€œYou know what I’m talking about,” said Derek. “Women don’t have any idea how to be friends. All they know how to do is compete with one another.”
    â€œMy dear boy,” Aunt Peg said. The words sounded like anything but an endearment. “Whatever gave you such a foolish idea?”
    â€œLife.” Derek shrugged. “Experience. Observation. Don’t you all agree?”
    He looked around the table at the other men present.
    Richard lifted his hands and shoulders in a comically broad shrug. “You’re on your own with this one, buddy.”
    â€œOkay, time out,” Rosalyn said. “I sure as heck didn’t drive all the way to Pennsylvania to rehash the war of the sexes. Entertaining as your company has been, I think I’m done here. It’s time for me to go find the people I’m supposed to be meeting for dinner.”
    Thankfully, Rosalyn’s announcement brought the budding argument to a halt. Everyone checked their watches and thought about their own plans. Drinks were finished, the bar tab settled.
    Tubby wandered away and joined another table. Derek and Marshall left together. Richard had a quick word with Aunt Peg, then disappeared too. Having dined the previous evening with my aunt, he would make his mother happy tonight by having dinner with her.
    That left Bertie, Peg, and me to figure out what we were going to do next.
    â€œYou need a real meal,” Aunt Peg said to me. “I bet you haven’t eaten a thing all day.”
    â€œI had soup. And crackers,” I added as an afterthought.
    â€œBarely enough to keep one person functioning,” she said sternly. “Much less two.”
    Point taken.
    The dining room was nearly full but the maitre d’ managed to find a table for three, situated by a window on an enclosed porch.
    â€œPerfect,” Aunt Peg pronounced. She immediately waved over a waitress and placed an order for three tall glasses of milk.
    â€œThree?” I said weakly.
    My aunt subscribes to the firm belief that any and all pregnancy related issues can be cured with dairy products. I knew, however, that I’d have trouble keeping even one glass of milk down.
    â€œThere’s no reason why you should be the only healthy one among us. Bertie and I will join you.”
    Bertie sent me a dark look, apparently less than pleased at being roped into my calcium support group. But when the milk arrived, she chugged hers down with good humor and even managed, when Aunt Peg wasn’t looking, to help make a dent in mine.
    Peg, meanwhile, ordered me a steak. It arrived looking thick, well cooked, and dripping with juices. Normally I make a great carnivore but now all I could see was a large dark blob of fat and sinew.
    I let the meat sit on my plate while I picked at my veggies and consoled myself with the knowledge that my body would ask for the foods it needed. Besides, I was up to date on my vitamins.
    Over dinner Aunt Peg adopted the role of cruise director and demanded to know how each of us had spent the day. Bertie went first, informing us that she had indeed had a massage. Aside from attending two seminars, she’d also managed to spend some time in the hot tub that afternoon.
    â€œHow very eighties,” I said with a laugh.
    â€œNo, really, it was great. Hot water below, cold air above, the smell of pine trees in the air, a tall hedge all around for privacy. I recommend it highly.”
    â€œI’ll pass,” I said. Water that hot was forbidden for the duration.
    Aunt Peg, however, looked interested.
    â€œHow does it