have it.”
“I know.”
“Did they do any damage?”
Tom laughed uproariously, catching Scott totally off guard.
“They were rank amateurs. Probably couldn’t touch their ass with both hands if you gave ‘em three chances. They tried to hotwire the damn thing, probably going by what they saw some actor do in a movie. They crawled up under the dash and snipped the first two wires they found. Then tried to cross connect ‘em to start the car.”
“And I’m guessing it didn’t work?”
Tom laughed again.
“Hell no. The idiots snipped the wires to my radio and to my turn signals.”
Now it was Scott’s turn to laugh.
“How much damage did they do?”
“Next to none. I don’t ever expect to use the radio or the turn signals again, so I just taped over the cut wires and that was the end of it.”
“Okay, so that fixed the small problem. The bigger problem is that they’re coming back, and you know it. Only this time they’ll have to shoot you so they can get the keys. And once you’re dead, they’ll not only take your car, but they’ll take Bonnie and Blue too. So what’s your plan to deal with that problem?”
“Well, my friend, that’s pretty much up to you and the girls.”
“Meaning what? Are you saying you’re finally going to do what you should have done in the first place and join us?”
“Well, when you put it that way it makes me sound like I’m a might stubborn.”
“Only because you are.”
“I suppose if I argued, it would just prove your point.”
“Yep.”
“Okay, then. I give up. I honestly didn’t think the violence would make it this far.”
“Maybe it was an isolated case. Maybe they won’t be back. But they know you have this car and they know it runs. So my guess is, they’ll keep coming back until they get it. And if they fired back at you, then they don’t mind using force to take it.”
“Yeah, I guess so. You sure you don’t mind me moving in over there?”
“Nope. We don’t mind at all. We’ve got a partially finished basement. We can put you in there until the winter time. You’ll have it all to yourself, so when the kids get on your nerves you’ll have someplace quiet to hang out. The only thing is, it gets cold down there in the winter time. So before the weather gets cold, we’ll convert the old Faraday barn into a bachelor pad.”
“Oh, I don’t want to put you through any trouble.”
“It’s no trouble. You see, we’ve already bought all the materials. The toilet, sink and shower, all the pvc pipe to connect it to the plumbing system. All the conduit, outlets and wiring we need to power it. Even insulation and sheetrock. It’s all sitting in a big pile in one of the other Butler buildings.”
Tom gave him a puzzled look.
“We told Jordan we would use all the materials to make the place for him. So he could feel more like a grownup by having his own place, of sorts. The problem is, when we evacuated, he brought Sara along. And that’s not a problem. We’re all getting to know Sara, and she’s quickly becoming part of the family.
“The problem is that Jordan doesn’t see her as a sister. He sees her as a hot chick. And he’s a teenager with raging hormones. So is she, by the way…”
“Okay, I get the picture. You’re afraid if Jordan has his own place, that she’ll sneak out at night and they’ll do some things they have no business doing.”
“Exactly. If they’re in the same house as us, it’ll be easier to keep track of them.”
“And you’re sure that Joyce and Linda are okay with me crashing their party?”
“Shoot. They told me if I didn’t talk you into it they were going to hang me by my ankles and castrate me. You wouldn’t want