Free ThinandBeautiful.com by Liane Shaw Page A

anything else to wear, which I don’t!” I kind of whined it, which I am not proud of. I tore off yet another sweater and threw it on the bed. Annie looked a little like she was regretting her offer to come and help me get ready.
    â€œI’m sure you have something nice. I doubt Suzanne has really paid that much attention to everything you own. I likethis one on you,” She held out a blue sweater. I put it on, even though I was pretty sure it was a discard from about an hour before.
    â€œOh, God, this one makes me look like a cow!” Still whining.
    â€œThen someone forgot to feed the animals, because you are a pretty skinny-looking cow!”
    â€œYeah, well, I’ve never seen a cow with a butt this big!” I twisted around so that I could see myself in the mirror. I needed one of those three-panel jobs the stores have.
    â€œYou obviously haven’t seen many cows then, city girl.” Annie said, shaking her head a little. She sounded impatient, which I thought was monumentally unfair. I mean, she offered to help.
    â€œI’ve seen enough cows to know when I look like one! I probably shouldn’t go. I wouldn’t fit in anyway.” I sat down on my clothes pile.
    â€œMaddie, please just put on some clothes and go. You used to make jokes about yourself and it was funny but now everything is so serious! You really sound like you’re going over the edge here.”
    â€œLook, I don’t need you here if you’re going to make things worse. I thought you came to help.”
    â€œI am trying. You aren’t really making it easy. I don’t understand what you’re doing.”
    â€œI’m sorry. I just want to look perfect.” I could feel the tears welling up and tried to fight them back. “I’ve tried so hard, but I still look fat in everything.”
    â€œMaddie, you don’t look fat. You can’t look fat, because youaren’t fat. Just look at yourself!” She took me by the shoulders and stood me in front of the mirror. I looked at myself. Was she blind or just trying to be mean? Couldn’t she see how fat I still was? Was she trying to make me feel bad?
    â€œYou just don’t understand,” I said, sniffling.
    â€œYou’re right, I don’t!” Annie looked a little like she wanted to cry too. What did she have to cry about? She had always been skinny, ever since we were kids. She couldn’t possibly get it.
    â€œShould I go or not? What if everyone laughs at me?” I asked, even though I was pretty sure she wouldn’t have an answer.
    â€œIf anyone laughs, you tell them exactly where to go and then you leave. Besides, no one is going laugh. You look great!” She said that because I finally had some clothes actually on. I kept on the blue sweater and matched it with some new, already faded jeans. My mother had a lot of trouble with that concept. She could not figure out why I would want to buy jeans that looked like someone else had already worn them for a year or two. I tried to explain the concept of fashion to her, but my mom still used the word “slacks” when she talked about my pants, so I figured she was a lost cause. I finger-combed my hair and took a deep breath.
    â€œSo, am I ready?”
    â€œYes, you are definitely ready. Have a terrific time … and relax!” Annie gave me a quick hug and headed off for home. I stood for another minute staring at myself in the mirror, willing it to make me smaller. The mirror was uncooperative so I just made myself go downstairs before I chickened out completely.
    Steve drove me to Suzanne’s huge house in the rich people’s subdivision. I could see the glow of lights reflecting off the pool in the backyard. Wow. We had one of those little molded plastic wading pools that we both had outgrown about a zillion years ago. We still filled it up sometimes just to cool our feet off. My whole house would have fit into