Free Following Flora by Natasha Farrant

nervous)
    No darling, just us. Your father and I . . .
    Â 
    FATHER
    (warning)
    Cassie!
    Â 
    FLORA
    (bursting into the kitchen)
    He’s here! He’s nearly here! Is everything ready?
    (she takes in the table, the napkins, the roast lamb)
    What are you doing? He’ll be terrified! I said it would just be pasta!
    Â 
    FATHER
    What on earth are you talking about?
    Â 
    FLORA
    Zach! I asked him and Zoran for dinner. Mum, didn’t you get my text?
    Â 
    MOTHER
    (looking appalled)
    My phone’s dead.
    Â 
    FATHER
    (looking furious)
    Call him right now and tell him he can’t come!
    Â 
    FLORA
    Oh my God, what is
wrong
with you?
    Â 
    TWIG enters in his underpants. Flora screams at him to put some clothes on. Twig replies that he doesn’t have any clothes because Mother accidentally donated all his jeans to charity. Mother replies he should stop complaining about his clothes being too small. Twig answers that normal people buy replacement clothes
before
giving the old ones away. Flora declares there is no way she is letting her boyfriend see her brother naked. Hermione quietly hops onto the table and starts to eat the smoked salmon. Father bats her away, knocking over a bottle of red wine.
    MOTHER
    My grandmother’s tablecloth!
    Â 
    FATHER
    (roaring)
    TO HELL WITH THE TABLECLOTH! AND TO HELL WITH CATS AND CANDLES AND INCONVENIENT BOYFRIENDS! TO HELL WITH ALL THE THINGS CONSTANTLY CONSPIRING TO DISRUPT EVERYTHING I TRY TO DO!
    Â 
    The whole family stares at him, fascinated. Nobody but CAMERAMAN notices the kitchen door open, revealing a worried-looking Zoran and a frankly petrified-looking Zach.
    MOTHER
    David, calm down.
    Â 
    FATHER
    THIS IS NOT WHAT THIS EVENING WAS MEANT TO BE ABOUT!
    Â 
    ZORAN
    (very softly)
    What was it meant to be about, David?
    Â 
    Father slumps, looking defeated and almost as terrified as Zach. Mother goes to him, takes his hand, then turns to face the camera.
    MOTHER
    We’re going to have a baby.
    Â 
    SUNDAY, DECEMBER 15
    Poor Zach. I bet he thought the first time he met Flora’s family it would be all about him. He probably rehearsed it in front of the mirror in Zoran’s tiny bathroom, wondering if he should call Dad
sir
or
Mr. Gadsby
, and was it all right to wear a hoodie or should he wear a shirt and should he buy Mum flowers or stuff like that. I bet he had no idea he was going to stumble into a room full of flying kittens and a load of people screaming and crying because they’d just heard life-changing news, straight after hearing himself described as
inconvenient
. I bet that was the last thing he expected.
    â€œThis is not unusual behavior,” I heard Zoran reassure Zach as they stood in the doorway, and then he was sweeping into the room and hugging Mum.
    â€œYou told them at last!” he said.
    â€œYou knew!” I cried.
    â€œI’ve been begging him to come back when the baby is born,” Mum sniffed. “And I was so worried how you all would take the news, with the age difference and everything.”
    I knew that by
everything
, she meant Iris. Apparently Zoran has been saying she should tell us for ages but she was too scared. Then when I got cross with her last night she realized she couldn’t keep it secret anymore.
    â€œAre you happy?” she asked me.
    â€œI think so,” I stammered.
    â€œA baby!” Flora looked stunned.
    â€œWill it be a boy?” Twig asked.
    Jas didn’t say anything to Mum or Dad at all. Instead she moved away from the little crowd gathered around the parents, making a beeline for Zach, looking very shy but also quite determined.
    â€œI loved your song,” I heard her whisper to him. Zach stopped looking scared and looked embarrassed instead.
    â€œCan I ask you a question?” she asked, and then she saw me listening and frowned for me to go away.
    Dinner was nice and barely burned at all. I think Mum was so relieved her secret was finally out