Free Z-Burbia: A Zombie Novel by Jake Bible

mister,” Pa says. “I thought we’d keep you around for a while. I kinda like you.” He looks at Elsbeth. “And she ’s more than I can handle sometimes. Would be nice to have another man help take care of her.”
    He pulls his boning knife and looks at the reflection of the fire in the blade.
    “But I ain’t gonna keep ya around if you’re going to starve yourself,” he says quietly. “You’ll just waste away to nothing and then what would you be good for?”
    “Gonna kill him now while he’s plump?” Elsbeth asks.
    “Seems like the smart thing to do,” Pa replies. “Help me get him up and trussed. And go get the buckets. We lost half the blood from the biker woman. Can’t waste blood like that.”
    “No, sorry, Pa,” Elsbeth says as she helps pull me to my feet. My body and arms slide up the pole and I’m looking her right in the eyes.
    “You don’t have to do this,” I say. “You don’t have to live like this. There’s better places to live than this basement.”
    “Is there now?” Pa says as he pushes Elsbeth away. “The buckets, girl!”
    “Right, Pa!” She hurries through a side door I hadn’t noticed. The smell of pennies gets stronger as the door swings open. I glance over. Wish I hadn’t. Bodies. Hanging. Dripping…
    “You were saying there’s better places to live than here?” Pa asks. “Where would those places be? Up in that penthouse of yours?” The knife nicks my cheek. It is wicked sharp. “I don’t appreciate you filling my girl with lies and dreams. Cotton candy and pinwheels, that’s all you are. A fading game on a summer night.”
    Okay, he’s lost me.
    Elsbeth comes back in with two large, five-gallon buckets.
    “Ain’t gonna lose the blood now, Pa,” she says.
    “Take your knife and cut his clothes off,” he orders. “Get him naked and we’ll wipe him down. Don’t want to taint the meat.”
    I’m pretty sure the workbench that hunk of whomever is resting on isn’t very sanitary, but decide now is not the time to quibble about what taints what.
    It takes her less than two minutes to get my clothes cut off. I stand there, arms bound behind me, cock and balls free for all to see, and shake my head.
    “What?” Pa asks.
    “Just wasn’t how I thought I’d die,” I say.
    “Really?” Pa laughs. “You had other plans? What? You planning on dying in your sleep in a feather bed up in that penthouse?”
    “That would be preferable,” I say. “Or you could let me go and I can just die out there somewhere. We can just skip the slicing and the dicing.”
    “It even cuts cans!” Elsbeth says out of the blue. “That’s Shakespeare.”
    Pa rolls his eye. “Sometimes it’s all I can do from killing that one.” He shrugs. “But you can’t always pick your family.”
    “I have a family too,” I say. “I’d really like to see them one last time before I die. You already said you have plenty of food. You don’t need to carve me up.”
    “Waste not, want not,” Elsbeth sing songs.
    “She has a point,” Pa says. “I smoke you up and wrap you in oil cloth and you’ll last us through the winter. How can I pass that up?”
    “I get it, I do,” I say, panic setting in. “We all have to do crazy shit to live. But you can’t keep eating people. You’ll get sick. People aren’t supposed to eat people. There are these things called prions-”
    “Called what?” Elsbeth asks.
    “Prions,” I repeat.
    “That’s a funny word,” she says and starts saying it over and over.
    “Shut up, will ya!” Pa barks, whirling on her, the knife slashing out and just missing her by a hair. She stumbles back and cowers against the wall. “It ain’t a funny word, it’s a science word.” He looks back at me. “You a teacher, mister? You trying to teach me and my girl?”
    “Uh, I could be a teacher,” I say. “I do know a lot of stuff-” The knife cuts across my cheek. Deep. I scream and wish I could clamp my hand to the flap of flesh I can feel