Free Undone by Elizabeth Norris

looked like they were almost braided and tied with some fancy knot. It was something I’d only seen once before. On the boots that were right next to my face the night Reid died.
    “It might not have even been a guard. Those stupid boots are making a fashion surge. Would you believe I saw this cute girl in a pink miniskirt and black combat boots?” Derek said. “It was unsettling. She was hot, but those boots just didn’t look inviting.”
    I pictured Janelle in black combat boots, but then I shook the image from my mind. I didn’t want it to stick. Not because I thought it was frightening, but more because it I didn’t want to picture her dressed like she was in IA.
    “I didn’t see anyone, man,” Derek added. “Just try to relax.”
    I nodded, but relaxing wasn’t something I’d been able to do for a long time.
    As I was about to get back under the car to finish the oil change, I spotted a tan sedan parked across the street. I couldn’t remember if I had seen it before or not. It was nondescript, the kind of car that from its profile could be any number of makes and models. In a color that just seemed to fade into the background.
    I stared at it. Something about it stood out. It wasn’t necessarily new, but it was too clean, too shiny, like it wasn’t used often, and its windows were tinted. It didn’t belong.
     
    We worked from seven to five, so when it hit five on the dot, Derek was already in the car. His hands drummed on the steering wheel as he waited for me.
    “I’m not up for dinner at Mom’s again,” he said when I got in.
    I nodded and settled back into the car.
    It only took me a few turns to realize we weren’t going home.
    “I have a surprise for you,” he said when I sat up a little straighter.
    “Have I ever loved surprises?”
    He laughed. “Remember when Mom used to always bring us home surprises? I loved that.”
    I smiled. I had too. She would come home from work and pick up surprise meals or surprise desserts or surprise presents that she gave us “just because.” I wondered if that had stopped when I left.
    We pulled into the parking lot of a bar called Rusty Hinges. It was decorated like a beach bar with tiki torches and fake-grass umbrellas shading the tables, even though we weren’t really anywhere near the beach.
    The drinking age here was only eighteen. “I’m still a year shy,” I said as we got out, wondering if my brother had forgotten.
    He shrugged. “I know a guy.”
    I followed, though I really didn’t want to go in. There were people laughing, sharing things with each other, having fun. I didn’t feel like I belonged there with them. If I was going to sit in a bar, it should be with people who knew me and understood me. With Eli and Reid and Janelle.
    “Look, I know you’re upset about Reid,” Derek said. “And I respect that you don’t want to talk about it. You’ve got a lot on your plate with Dad and everything that you weren’t expecting here, but you can have fun, too. I’ve been sort of seeing this girl, Alice. We’re meeting her and a friend. It’ll be great. Like a quad date.”
    “Quad date?” I said.
    “Yeah, four people,” Derek said. “You know, on a date?”
    I swallowed hard. There wasn’t much he could have said to make me want to go in less. That was my fault, though. Because I hadn’t told him much. It felt selfish to go into all of the things that had happened to me in another world, when right here his life, my family’s lives, had fallen apart. I hadn’t said anything to him about Janelle. Not really.
    Even though I told my mom about her, it hadn’t felt right to bring her up to Derek. Not after I realized what had happened here, how much of their lives I’d ruined. It didn’t feel right to tell him that Janelle had made me happy, had made me feel alive in that other world, or that I missed her every second I was here. I wanted my brother to be happy. I couldn’t bear for him to think that I wasn’t glad to be