Free My Big Bottom Blessing by Teasi Cannon Page B

afford you all the privileges you had. If you didn't live up to it, you were not being very appreciative.
    Fast forward to your adult life. How are things now? Can you look back and see that you've been living your entire life trying to please your earthly father because when you do well he is happy, and when you fail he withdraws his love. Are you doing that now for God? Do you volunteer for everything at church because you want to be a good girl? Do you feel like you should pray more, study more, or do more and more to please Him? Do you think you have to earn God's love through performance just like you did your earthly dad? If so, you are missing out.
    Or maybe your father was passive. He was present at home and didn't demand much; in fact he didn't seem to want anything. He would come home from work, sit in front of the TV for hours, eating dinner in the living room so he wouldn't miss the big game. When you walked in, he would give you a quick smile and a pat on the head, but would not have time to engage in conversation with you. Mom would do all of that. His job was to provide the money for necessities, nothing more. He was there, but he wasn't.
    As an adult do you keep your relationship with Father God distant—logical and intellectual and only that? Do you keep your heart to yourself because you don't believe your heavenly Father cares about it just as your earthly father didn't? Do you believe in the Bible, but shy away from any emotional manifestations of God's love? Are you uncomfortable with others around you showing emotion in their relationship with Him? Are you uncomfortable with love in general? If so, you are missing out.
    Or maybe your father was directly abusive to you in some way, and if so, you were definitely not alone. There are more than three million reports of child abuse in America each year with over 68 percent of those being sexual abuse by a family member. 7 If this was your story, you were probably desperate for your daddy's love. When you heard his car pull up, your heart skipped a beat because you were excited to see him. Only when he came in the door he was drunk. He would immediately yell at your mom and push your little sister aside as if she were an annoying piece of furniture in his way. But sometimes he was sober, and you lived for those moments because he would hold you in his lap. You were so happy to have his attention that you chose to ignore where his hands traveled, and you would never tell anyone about that because you were afraid to make him mad.
    So as an adult you are left with this strange mix of emotions. You want to love God, but how can you possibly call God your Father? How can you trust your heart to Him? Every time you trusted in your past, you were hurt. Daddy was unpredictable and became one to be feared, not held by. Do you resist God's touch now? Do you believe that He is someone everyone else can trust, but not you? Do you hold back your heart from Him because you just can't stand to be hurt again? If so, you are missing out.
FALSE ACCUSATIONS
    The point of taking a look at our relationships with our parents, and even more specifically our fathers, is not to build a case for blame. Blaming others doesn't get us anywhere. The point is to begin to identify potential false accusations we've piled up against God. Have we given him a false rap sheet, of sorts? Does our list of adjectives describe the true nature and heart of our heavenly Father?
    The only way we can find out is to look at what the Bible says about His heart. And one amazingly simple way to find out a ton about our heavenly Dad is to look at the life of Jesus.
    Now, remember all those warm fuzzy feelings we had about Jesus when we made our list of descriptions for Him? We think of Jesus as someone we are very comfortable with. We might even see Him as our big brother who protects us from angry Dad when we've blown it.
    But take a look at what Jesus had to say about Himself.
    â€œIf you had known