Free The Instant When Everything is Perfect by Jessica Barksdale Inclan Page A

man.”
     
    Katherine catches Mia’s gaze on Ford’s backside, shakes her head, and stands up.
     
    “I’m going to go check at the desk,” Katherine plops the basket of cookies in Mia’s lap. “I knew I should have scrubbed in.”
     
    “Could you really have done that?” Dahlia asks. She puts down her Elle magazine and takes a cookie from Mia’s lap.
     
    Katherine shrugs. “I don’t have privileges. But I’m sure I could have forced the issue. I’ll be right back.”
     
    Katherine stalks out, and Mia looks at Dahlia. “She can force just about anything she wants.”
     
    Dahlia laughs and then takes a big bite of cookie, the crumbs falling on her magazine.
     
    The scent of the cookies wavers up from the basket, a buttery, sugar waft. Mia shoves them off her lap and onto the chair next to Dahlia. Ever since she began her internet search about breast cancer, she’s learned that overweight women have a higher incidence of breast cancer. Of all cancers. Of just about any disease. In the days prior to Sally’s surgery, she’s read about the tests and studies and reports, and knows, clearly, that she’s at risk. For one, her own mother has cancer. And Mia has a good twenty-five pounds too many on her body. And too much fat equals too much estrogen, which heightens the risk. Mia is a cancer bulls-eye. Even now, something could be growing in her, a mad cell replicating out of control, spinning into a tumor fueled by fat.
     
    Mia’s lost two pounds, but as she looks at Ford’s rear as he bends over the water fountain, she realizes that’s how much her shoes weigh. She forgot to take them off the first time she got on the scale.
     
    Ford stands and turns around. He’s left work and has to go back to San Francisco to tie up some last minute deal with people from the Pay Rite account. Often, Mia has asked him to explain exactly what he does. As he carefully goes over his job that he’s had for the past ten years, Mia thinks she understands it on a basic level. He and his partner Karen work with companies to manage employees’ stock options. But how they deal with the stock options (she knows what stocks are, but the options part is still a question) is what Mia doesn’t understand.
     
    “So we work with the employees to set up accounts so that they can buy and sell when they need to. Invest, divest,” he said, and as he went on explaining to her the services he and Karen offer, Mia felt her mind wander, nodding when she had to, and smiling when he was done.
     
    One day, she thinks, she will really listen. She’ll take notes. She’ll totally understand.
     
    Katherine stomps back in, her black hair a cape behind her. “She’s almost through.”
     
    “She’s okay?” Ford asks, rolling down his sleeves and buttoning them.
     
    “Seems so. The news from the operating room is good.”
     
    Ford looks at Mia, and she can see what he’s saying with his eyes. He wants to go because it’s good news. Mia wants him to stay because she’s not sure it will be. But he’s adjusting his tie, fixing his collar. He’s going to leave, unless she throws herself down on the floor and begs him not to, and she won’t do that here, not in front of Katherine.
     
    Ford walks over to Mia and bends down to kiss her on the head. “I’m going to head back. My cell phone’s on. Call me when she comes out of it. Call me for anything. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
     
    Mia sighs, nods, and looks up at him. For more than half her life, he is who she’s turned to for comfort, for help, for company. And he won’t stay. “Fine. I’ll let you know.”
     
    He kisses her again, puts a hand on Katherine’s shoulder, and waves to Dahlia. Then he’s nothing but a sound of footsteps in the hallway.
     
    “He couldn’t wait to get out of here.” Katherine sits down and crosses her legs.
     
    Mia breathes in sharply and feels a back molar with her tongue. For a second, she imagines she hears Ford’s footsteps