Free Eye of the Burning Man: A Mick Callahan Novel (The Mick Callahan Series) by Harry Shannon

thought. "I might stay sober long enough to realize that being sober was a better way to live. So you knew I had a real thing for you?"
    "Yeah, I did. But I never looked at acting on it as a real possibility. I just figured I'd tinker with your taste in men."
    "Oh, you did, did you?"
    "Yup, I thought I could maybe improve on it some."
    "Like I said, you're cocky, Callahan."
    "I've heard that before."
    "I've got to let you off the hook, because I know Mary is just another addict to you, except she happens to be a female . . . and this time it's a little more personal. My question was rhetorical."
    "It was?"
    "I'm a woman who's been lonely quite a while. I could really use me a big, strapping man to hang out with. I gave you my best shot, and I never even got me a goodnight kiss. A girl remembers things like that."
    "Suzanne, look. You're a spectacular female, and . . ."
    "Oh shut up, Mick. I'm done talking yet. Now, I have also seen you go up to the street bums after meetings. Although street bums don't generally get a crush on you, and then do what they're told, do they?"
    I smiled. "Mostly not."
    "And didn't you let that redneck bastard Tim W. sleep on your couch for a couple of weeks last month, while he looked for work as a truck driver?"
    "Yeah, but he went and got high again. I had to throw him out."
    She shrugged. "Can't get them drunk and can't get them to sober up either. It's all a matter of choice. I rest my case."
    "As Hal would say, you are valued. You're a knockout, and some good man is bound to see that sooner or later."
    "Fuck later, Mick. Make it sooner."
    "I'll keep my eyes peeled, but I want you to choose wisely. You're special."
    "The feeling is mutual," she said. "Now go saw some logs. You look like death warmed over. What do you have on your schedule today?"
    I groaned. "Oh shit, that's right."
    "What?"
    I shook my head. "I have some photo shoots, publicity stuff. The kind of crap I really hate. And now I'm going to look all bloodshot and wrecked. Half of California will think I'm drinking again."
    "Can you put it off?"
    "I don't know. I'll get some sleep and call them when they're in the office. Maybe I can postpone it for a couple of days. It's the L.A. Times Sunday magazine thing. They want to write something about the show."
    "Go crash, Mick. I'll just sit here with my eyes closed. When do you want me to wake you up?"
    "Give me until ten." I kissed her on the cheek and stumbled out to the couch. The sun disturbed me. After a few moments I went into the bathroom and rooted around in the cabinets looking for an old, black sleep mask from a Virgin Air flight I'd taken to England. As I passed the kitchen I saw Peanut fast sleep, despite the coffee, with her long legs up on another kitchen chair.
    I went back to the couch, sprawled out, and slipped the mask over my eyes. I still felt restless. My mind saw Donny Boy laughing, and the fierce blade of a sharp hunting knife moving towards my exposed throat. I forced myself to meditate on the image of a calm pool of water. Within a few moments I was under.
    . . . In the dream I was a young boy again in the sunshine of Nevada, riding bareback on a Palomino, clinging to her pale, streaming mane. I was one with the animal, loping along over hard-packed, white desert soil; moving as if in slow motion through clumps of turquoise sage dotted with yellowing flowers. I felt shoulders baked red by the dry heat and lips parched from thirst, but rode on. The horse faltered and complained. I stroked her thick neck and murmured that there was a small stream deep among the cherry trees at the top of the mountain. Finally we entered the cool shade of the grove. The horse nickered at the sound and smell of rushing water and quickened her pace . . .
    "Get your filthy hands off of me! Let me the fuck out of here!"
    I sat up, startled, and looked around. I was blind. Panicked, I knocked over the table lamp by the couch before I remembered the sleep mask. I pulled it away from my