Free Serendipity and Me (9781101602805) by Judith Roth Page B

away
    when I set her down
    she rolls in the dirt.
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    She’s not exactly
    the princess type.
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    But at least I get
    a warm-up poem out of it.
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    A TRIP OUTSIDE
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    Maybe if you weren’t
    so white
    I wouldn’t know when you got
    so dirty.
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    You look like a cloud
    that is thinking
    it ought to rain.
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    You look like a marshmallow
    dunked in hot chocolate
    and dropped in the dirt.
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    You look like a pile of socks
    someone should put
    in the wash.
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    I thought I only
    took my eyes off Serendipity
    for a second
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    but when I look up from the page
    she’s gone.
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    I scan the yard.
    I call her name.
    Does she know her name?
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    I walk the edges in a quick-step
    looking behind bushes
    up into trees.
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    How could she disappear
    so quickly?
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    I think she’s too little
    to climb the fence
    but then I see something
    that makes my heart bang:
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    a kitten-sized hole in the fence
    the side that leads
    to the front of the house
    and the street.
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    She could be anywhere.
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    It’s close to dinnertime.
    Somehow the light changed
    while I’ve been searching.
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    No sun.
    The gray of dusk is closing in
    and a feeling of impending fog.
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    I race out the gate
    for a quick look in the front yard
    but no one is there
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    no little white shape
    to turn and greet
    or even startle and dash
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    only silence and emptiness.
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    Dad! I start to yell
    before I even get in the front door.
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    I find him in the kitchen.
    He turns with the phone in his hand
    and a strained expression on his face.
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    I can’t find Serendipity.
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    He doesn’t seem to take this in.
    When were you going to tell me
    that Taylor wasn’t taking the cat?
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    What?
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    He hangs up/bangs up the phone.
    Taylor’s mom just called to say
    you left your sweater at their house.
    I asked her if she’d made her mind up
    about Serendipity
    and she thought I was kidding.
    He throws out his hands.
    She’s allergic, Sara.
    There was never any chance
    they were going to take the cat.
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    I’m not sure which disaster is worse—
    Serendipity’s disappearance
    or the uncovering of the plot.
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    Dad, she’s gone.
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    Dad looks at me
    then shuts his eyes.
    I can’t abide lying
    he says.
    Maybe now
    things will get back
    to normal.
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    I can’t believe what I’m hearing.
    Normal? You want things back to normal?
    I can feel my voice rising
    like a crazy person’s.
    What was so great about normal, Dad?
    I don’t remember that
    making you happy.
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    Dad’s face drops, but his eyes stay stern.
    She is not your cat.
    You knew that from the start.
    How could you sneak around
    behind my back?
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    That is too much.
    You’re a great one for talking
    about sneaking around.
    I know about you and Mom.
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    Dad closes his eyes like he has a headache.
    You’re a child.
    You don’t know anything.
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    That’s because you won’t tell me anything!
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    He shakes his head hard and turns
    the usual cowardly direction
    toward his room.
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    It’s becoming clear—
    he’s not going to help me find her.
    He doesn’t care if she’s lost forever.
    He doesn’t care how scared I am.
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    I reach for the doorknob.
    I will go outside
    and find her myself.
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    He hasn’t done
    his standard disappearing act yet.
    Sara, he says, go to your room.
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    My mouth drops open.
    No, I have to find her.
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    Go to your room.             Now.
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    I think my heart has just become
    a dumping place
    for sharp and heavy rocks.
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    How can he be so mean?
    She’s lost.
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    What’s so wrong about wanting
    a cat in my life?
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    I shouldn’t have to lie
    in order to get one.
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    Serendipity is lost
    and I’m being sent to my room?
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    I stand at my window and look out on the