Free Love Birds? by Carolyn McCray, Ben Hopkin Page B

muttered then raised her voice. “It’s
never a quick call.” Their client turned her attention back to them. “I’m
sorry. I really thought that doing this on Valentine’s Day would make it so
that we could do this all together.”
    “Hey, yeah, no problem,” Wyatt said, still trying to get his
hair back in place while eyeing the arguing birds. “They always so friendly?”
    The woman sighed. “They used to be so in love. Grooming each
other. They could barely be apart, but now?”
    She indicated to the curtain rod. Each bird had settled on
either end, glaring at one another.
    Mr. Haufman came out of the office, setting both birds
squawking at one another. “Satisfied?” he asked his wife. “A short call.”
    Ragan did not seem satisfied at all especially with the two lovebirds
high pitched cries. “And its only taken how many weeks to schedule a
simple appointment?”
    Jazmine stepped forward before the humans started fighting
as badly as the birds. “Well, I think we will need to do a thorough history and
then discuss—”
    “No need,” Wyatt announced. “I’ve got this covered.”
    She turned on her heel. Wyatt seldom had anything “covered”
and this? They had barely walked into the house. Jazmine knew they had to keep
up appearances that Wyatt had “psychic” abilities, but she comforted herself in
doing their job properly. Figuring out all the environmental factors, making
sure the pets had been to a veterinarian to be certain there were no underlying
medical conditions, reviewing the pet’s diet, basically making sure that the
clients got their money’s worth.
    “Wyatt, perhaps we should take a moment—”
    “Nope,” Wyatt stated. “I am hearing those lovebirds loud and
clear.”
    * * *
    Wyatt, of course, had no real idea what he was going to say.
When did he? But those lovebirds were looking a little twitchy, flapping their
green wings and snapping open and closed their hooked beaks. Sure they might be
weighed in grams, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t take a chunk out of you.
    Besides he’d seen a couple like this before. Not the birds,
but the humans. They looked just like his sister and brother-in-law. The way
the husband was turned away from the wife, and the wife’s arms were wrapped
around her waist. Add in this big rambling house, recently purchased as
evidenced by the smell of fresh paint plus the station wagon out front.
    A couple didn’t buy all that without an expectation of the
pitter-patter of little feet.
    “You see,” Wyatt started. “I think the lovebirds want to
start a family.” Jazmine backed away, shaking her head, but he ignored her
peculiarities and marched on. “They want to build a nest.”
    Mr. and Mrs. Haufman frowned but not the scowl like Jazmine
more like a frown you get when somebody is talking turkey or in this case,
lovebird.
    “And sometimes the guy—”
    “Bird,” Jazmine interjected.
    “Yeah, the guy bird feels like he’s got to build this
amazing nest. Since he can’t lay the eggs, building a tricked out nest, that’s
his job, ya know?”
    Mr. Haufman nodded as one of the birds flittered down from
the curtain rod and landed on his shoulder.
    “He’s worried he won’t be a good enough dad,” Wyatt hurried
over Jazmine, “ Bird dad. That his kids, I mean, chicks, I mean
hatchling, I mean… Oh, you know what I mean, will need more than he can
provide.”
    While Mr. Haufman’s head was bobbing up and down in
agreement, Mrs. Haufman had adopted Jazmine’s scowl. Wyatt turned to the wife.
    “And while the dad, bird dad, of course, bird dad, is
off getting the nest ready the mom bird feels left out and lonely.” The
second little green and red monster swooped down landing on Mrs. Haufman’s
shoulder as Wyatt continued, “Then she starts to wonder if the dad bird even
wants little love birds anymore.”
    Tears sprang to Mrs. Hauffman’s eyes. “I can see why the
birds have been so upset.”
    “Yeah,” Mr. Haufman took his