Free Ant Attack by Ali Sparkes

“Guess what, boys?” Mom peered around the bedroom door with a grin.
    Josh and Danny paused in their fight with rolled-up newspaper swords. They smiled innocently at her.
    â€œWhat?” urged Danny.
    The grin got stiffer. “Tarquin’s here to play!” Mom gulped. The looks on her twin sons’ faces were dark. It felt as if Halloween had arrived early.
    â€œ
Tarquin
,” said Josh.
    â€œHere,” said Danny.
    Piddle the dog whined and shot under the bunk bed.
    Danny threw down his sword. He turned to Josh and opened out his arms. He commanded:
    â€œThrough the heart. And make it quick.”
    â€œOh, come on! It’ll be
fun
!” said Mom. “Sshhh! He’s coming up the stairs.”
    They could clearly hear Tarquin approaching. He appeared to be singing opera.
    â€œBut we can’t
stand
Tarquin!” hissed Danny, pushing his messy blond hair off his furrowed forehead. “And you don’t even
like
his mom! Remember how snotty she was about you winning the best garden contest?”
    Mom sighed. She said in a low voice, “I’ve let bygones be bygones! His mom needed help today. She’s visiting a sick aunt. We have to look after each other. We’re a
community
! Oh—here he is now!”
    Tarquin trailed past her into Josh and Danny’s room. At seven and a half, he was nearly their age, but he looked about fifty-five. He was dressed in neatly ironed pants, a blue shirt, and a proper matching jacket. His hair was severely parted and combed flat to his head. His googly gray eyes narrowed as he examined their room. “It’s rather a mess, isn’t it?” he said, in his peculiar high-pitched voice.

    â€œWell, duh!” said Danny. “It’s a boys’ room!”
    â€œYes,” said Tarquin. “And so is mine. But I still refrain from growing fungus in it.” He eyed a jar of something gooey on the windowsill. The jar had once been filled with tadpoles. Josh had set them free in the garden pond last week. It
had
gotten a little furry.
    â€œHave fun, boys,” called Mom, already halfway downstairs.
    Tarquin began to wander around, poking at their stuff. He prodded their comics and sniffed. “
So
childish.”
    Danny mouthed, “
Childish? Spider-Man?
” at Josh and picked up his sword again. Josh frowned at him and shook his head.
    â€œSo what do you read then, Tarquin?” said Josh, trying hard to sound friendly.
    â€œOh—
Classical Music
magazine.
New Scientist
. You wouldn’t know them. I don’t suppose you know anything about the arts or science.”
    â€œWe know a
lot
about science!” burst out Danny. “We’ve had more science in the last six weeks than you’ve had in your life, you little—”
    â€œShut up, Danny,” said Josh. He was worried about what his brother might say next. Maybe he would tell Tarquin that he and Josh had been involved with scientific experiments. They were so amazing that every scientist in the world would explode with astonishment if they knew. Maybe he’d boast that they’d been turned into spiders, then flies, and then grasshoppers over this year. This was after getting tangled up with the brilliant(but quite probably crazy) old lady scientist next door.
    Petty Potts seemed like a dotty old dear, but she was in fact a genius. She had created S.W.I.T.C.H. spray, which could turn any creature into a creepy-crawly. She’d made a drinkable version too, and that was even stronger. What’s more, if Josh and Danny managed to help her find the missing parts of her REPTOSWITCH formula, she could change them into alligators or giant pythons! It was a fantastic secret. Josh was determined that Danny wouldn’t blurt it out to Tarquin.
    â€œOh—don’t be offended,” Tarquin was saying now. He picked up Josh’s magnifying glass from the top of their bookcase and turned it over in one hand.