Free Lucia Victrix by E. F. Benson Page A

photograph signed Amelia Faraglione.
    ‘You recognize, no doubt, the family likeness,’ she said to Lucia. ‘My husband’s sister Amelia who married the Conte di Faraglione, of the old Neapolitan nobility. That is he.’
    ‘Charming,’ said Lucia. ‘And so like Mr Wyse. And that Order? What is that?’
    Mrs Wyse hastily shut the morocco box.
    ‘So like servants to leave that about,’ she said. ‘But they seem proud of it. Graciously bestowed upon me. Member of the British Empire. Ah, here is Algernon with the keys. I was showing Mrs Lucas, dear, the photograph of Amelia. She recognized the likeness at once. Now let us all pack in. A warm morning, is it not? I don’t think I shall need my furs.’
    The total distance to be traversed was not more than a hundred yards, but Porpoise Street was very steep, and the cobbles which must be crossed very unpleasant to walk on, so Mrs Wyse explained. They had to wait some little while at the corner, twenty yards away from where they started, for a van was coming down the street from the direction of Mallards, and the Royce could not possibly pass it, and then they came under fire of the windows of Miss Mapp’s garden-room. As usual at this hour she was sitting there with the morning paper in her hand in which she could immerse herself if anybody passed whom she did not wish to see, but was otherwise intent on the movements of the street.
    Diva Plaistow had looked in with the news that she had seen Lucia and Georgie at the house-agents’, and that her canary still lived. Miss Mapp professed her delight to hear about the canary, but was secretly distrustful of whether Diva had seen the visitors or not. Diva was so imaginative; to have seen a man and a woman who were strangers was quite enough to make her believe she had seen Them. Then the Royce heaved into sight round the corner below, and Miss Mapp became much excited.
    ‘I think, Diva,’ she said, ‘that this is Mrs Lucas’s beautiful car coming. Probably she is going to call on me about something she wants to know. If you sit at the piano you will see her as she gets out. Then we shall know whether you really –’
    The car came slowly up, barked loudly and instead of stopping at the front door of Mallards, turned up the street in the direction of Mallards Cottage. Simultaneously Miss Mapp caught sight of that odious chauffeur of Mrs Wyse’s. She could not see more than people’s knees in the car itself (that was the one disadvantage of the garden-room window being so high above the street), but there were several pairs of them.
    ‘No, it’s only Susan’s great lumbering bus,’ she said, ‘filling up the street as usual. Probably she has found out that Mrs Lucas is staying at the Trader’s Arms, and has gone to leave cards. Such a woman to shove herself in where she’s not wanted
I
never saw. Luckily I told Mrs Lucas what a dreadful snob she was.’
    ‘A disappointment to you, dear, when you thought Mrs Lucas was coming to call,’ said Diva. ‘But I did see them this morning at Woolgar’s and it’s no use saying I didn’t!’
    Miss Mapp uttered a shrill cry.
    ‘Diva, they’ve stopped at Mallards Cottage. They’re getting out. Susan first – so like her – and … it’s Them. She’s got hold of them somehow … There’s Mr Wyse with the keys, bowing … They’re going in … I was right, then, when I saw them peering in through the windows yesterday. Mr Pillson’s come to see the house, and the Wyses have got hold of them. You may wager they know by now about the Count and Countess Faradiddleone, and the Order of the British Empire. I really didn’t think Mrs Lucas would be so easily taken in. However, it’s no business of mine.’
    There could not have been a better reason for Miss Mapp being violently interested in all that happened. Then an idea struck her and the agitated creases in her face faded out.
    ‘Let us pop in to Mallards Cottage, Diva, while they are still there,’ she said.