Chapter One
Devon Ducaine knocked cheerfully on the door of Scott's condo, excitement making his usually calm body twitch with anticipation. He'd hoped Scott would answer right away, just come flying to the door because he missed Devon so much and couldn't wait to get his hands on him. When that didn't happen, Devon fought the urge to knock again. He didn't want to seem too desperate or needy and it was ass o'clock in the morning so he forced himself to be patient, humming an old tune quietly to pass what seemed like hours of standing on the stoop.
But as minute after minute passed with no response he felt his confidence ebbing away. He stood on the step a while longer, shuffling his feet and wondering just when the hell he'd become the nervous one in his and Scott's relationship. He suspected it had something to do with the mutual I love you's they'd confessed during their reconciliation, barely a week ago. There was just something different—something awesome but also scary—about loving someone and knowing they loved you back. And having the words spoken brought everything to an all new level.
Devon had never told anyone he loved them before, except his bandmates and family, of course, but saying it to Scott had seemed natural. Scott had even questioned how he could say it so easily. To be fair, Devon had just been punched in the face by his best friend and probably had a concussion, so the words might have rolled off his tongue a little more freely than they normally would. But concussed or not, he'd been feeling them in his heart for a quite a while before.
Being in love felt good. Devon though it was like the end of a really awesome gig that had the audience screaming and stomping for a first, second and third encore, except one hundred times better. He'd had a hard time keeping his business-face and composure on his recent trip when an overwhelming urge to smile seeped into his heart every time he thought about Scott. Which had been just about all the time.
They'd texted a few times a day plus talked every night about whatever popped into their heads. There might have been a little phone sex, too, but it was mild compared to what Devon really wanted to do to and with Scott, once they were in the same freaking state. Though just holding him when he slept was pretty far up on the list, as well.
Scott had also sent a ranting email about his mother that Devon had tried his hardest to dissect, but the words had been little more than frustrated, rambling sentences on the page. The email had worried Devon a bit. He'd tried to bring it up with Scott but had been met with a dozen assurances that is was "nothing important" and a brick wall of apologies for sending the email in the first place. Devon's mama hadn't raised any fools though, and he knew Scott well enough to realize whatever he was trying shrug off had to be damn important. Not something Devon should just let go.
No worries, Devon would wait Scott out. He was good at waiting. He'd dropped the subject, filed it away for later and kept up the low-key texting with Scott even though every conversation just made his all-consuming need to see Scott—touch, hold, just be with him—more intense. This love stuff was tough.
Of course, Devon had torment of his own circling his brain. Guilt about not having been honest with Scott still lingered and simmered in his subconscious, along with echoed memories of the pain of having his heart shatter when they broke up. He'd been dead wrong about how he'd handled their relationship, he'd made bad choices, choices that inevitably had blown up in his face. His untold lies had backfired, sending Scott storming out of his life instead of keeping him close. It was a time he still hated to think about.
Getting back together had taped up the major breaks in Devon's heart but he knew there were still cracks to be filled and penance to be paid to Scott. He also knew Scott still had questions, concerns and trust issues—who could