Free Missing Hart by Ella Fox

with her.”
    My heart was breaking, one miserable shard at a time. I couldn’t bear to see Dillon and Leah like this, and I hated that there was nothing I could say to make it any better. There was no panacea for this situation-only time would give enough distance for it to hurt any less and there was no way to speed the process up.
    Laying my hands on his shoulders, I squeezed gently. “Hey, don’t talk like that. You’re in the middle of a living nightmare and you need to cut yourself some slack. She didn’t take your strength with her. You still have it, but right now you need to grieve and let me take care of you. Don’t beat yourself up because it will only make it worse.”
    Hanging his head he said, “God, Minnie… I don’t know what we would do without you here.”
    Getting back on my feet, I took a step back. “You stay out here for as long as you need to. If there is a note, is it okay if I give it to Leah to read?”
    His broken hearted, “Yes” was enough to make me want to cry again, but I held myself together. I think I did a pretty good job of appearing composed as I returned to the house and got Leah a glass of iced tea, but it was a struggle not to scream out when I got into Marissa’s bedroom.
    Nothing could have prepared me for how shockingly sterile it was.
    There were no more photos on the walls or on the dresser, no real signs that anyone had lived in the room. Her bed was made and atop it sat a box marked, ‘Marissa’s photos’. I quickly realized that she had also emptied her closet and all of her drawers into boxes that were neatly labeled and stacked against the wall on the other side of the room.
    My heart stopped when I saw four envelopes sitting on the bureau. One was marked, ‘What to do now,’ while the other three each had one name written in the middle-Dillon’s, Leah’s, and mine. Next to the envelopes were here house keys and cell phone. The only thing missing was the car key she had taken with her when she drove to the spot where she had ended her life.
    The horrible realization of what she had done hit me like an asteroid making contact with earth. This wasn’t a spur of the moment decision. She had planned this, had hours to get it together just the way she wanted it.
    I left Dillon’s letter on the dresser, knowing it needed to be his decision whether or not to read it now or later. I wouldn’t put any pressure on him by leaving it in an area where he would immediately see it. Closing the door, I took a deep breath and forced myself to remain calm. Returning to the living room, I sat next to Leah and showed her the envelopes.
    She clutched the one with her name on it in her hand, but didn’t open it.
    “I can’t, not yet. I’m going to put it in my purse and take it home with me. If I read it now… I feel like it will destroy me. Does that make sense?”
    It made perfect sense. I had no intention of reading mine just yet either, so I nodded.
    Gesturing to the envelope that said, ‘What to do now’ I said, “That one, unfortunately, we have to read because I think it’s going to explain what kind of burial she wanted. Do you want me to open it?”
    I hadn’t realized that Dillon had come back into the house, so I startled when he answered the question from the kitchen doorway.
    “Yes. Read what it says out loud.”
    With shaking hands, I opened Marissa’s final instructions and began to read them to Dillon and Leah.
    My three loves,
    Dillon, Leah and Minnie,
    I’ve done everything I can to make this as easy as possible. My clothes are packed up and my cell phone and keys are where you can find them. I’ve stocked the house with enough food for at least two weeks, the laundry is done and the kitchen, living room and bathroom are all clean. I will leave the key to my car in the glove compartment. The car will be parked on the street I’m going to.
    I’d like to be cremated. What you do with me from there is up to you. Should you want to keep my remains