Free It's a Guy Thing by David Deida

gifts. Without the full masculine and feminine, we become weakened. One feminine weakness is to feel, Unless I’m married, unless I’m in a long-term intimate relationship, I can’t really experience love . One masculine weakness is to think, Well, if we get married I can’t be free. I don’t want to limit my life. I don’t want to be trapped .
    When we are balanced with ourselves and in our relationships, we are free to give our love without fearing dependency, loss of self or confinement. We are free and we are loving. If our relationship ends tomorrow, fine—today we give each other love. If our relationship lasts a lifetime, fine—today we give each other love.

    Why Is So Much Emphasis Placed on a Woman’s Attractiveness?
    The masculine and feminine forces of the universe are evident in religious and spiritual archetypes the world over. In Hinduism, as mentioned earlier, the one Divine Being is conceived to have two aspects: Shiva and Shakti, man and woman or masculine and feminine energies. Shakti is the feminine energy.
    Shakti attracts Shiva, the masculine form of the Divine, into incarnation. The divine play in Hinduism is the incarnation of the transcendental aspect of the Divine, or the masculine aspect, into life, attracted by the feminine aspect of the Divine.The story of Jesus is another example of this divine process. Jesus’s play with women, with Mary, was about incarnating as a human. In the book and movie, The Last Temptation of Christ , this is portrayed vividly. Since it is told from a patriarchally biased perspective, however, Jesus’s attraction to women is seen as evil. In the Adam and Eve myth also, it is the woman who invites the man with the apple, the fruit, the life.
    The feminine attracts the masculine into life and love. That’s the spiritual function, so to speak, of the feminine aspect of the Divine with respect to the masculine: to attract the masculine into life, into love.
    You could be whole as a person without doing this, but to be whole as a woman in emotional and sexual intimacy with a man, you have to be comfortable in the role of attracting the masculine into life and love. Embodying the feminine pole of relationship means to be connected to your heart, breathing love in and out of your whole body, giving and receiving love with your man, and creatively using your energy in a way which attracts the masculine into life, love and relational enjoyment.
    The masculine is the opposite, or really the complement, of the feminine. It’s the transcendental aspect of the Divine that is free of the motion of life. The masculine brings insight, perspective and humor when the feminine is lost. When life seems confusing, when you are lost in a mood, it’s the masculine that stands free of confusion, embraces you unconditionally, and says, “I love you.” The masculine penetrates through your shell of emotional closure and opens your heart with passion, playfulness and integrity. The masculine brings you out of the complexity of emotions into the simplicity of love. It is a transcendental awakening into freedom.
    The masculine gives the gift of transcendental awakening. The feminine gives the gifts of life energy and love. Together, the two are consummated in transcendental love. In the drama of intimacy, the play of the feminine with respect to the masculine is the attraction of the masculine into life through love. That’s the greatest gift you could give your man.
    You might choose not to do that, and that’s fine. You may prefer to give your love in a more neutral, or even masculine, way. However, there is a difference between free choice and suppression. Especially in today’s culture, the whole feminine way of being is suppressed and criticized. It’s very difficult for men and women in our culture to allow themselves to relax in their feminine energy.
    In our culture today, feminine attractiveness is sometimes considered suspect. But attraction is a key element of the