Free Conversations With the Fat Girl by Liza Palmer

ten thirty the next
    morning. Adam is meeting a colleague early for some ?time on the links.?
    I wave good-bye to him and hug Olivia one last time. She is tiny I feel
    her bones as I hug her and cringe. My best friend is wasting away and
    loving every minute of it.
     
    64
     
    Domenic's Underpants
     
    I have always dreamed of getting married in a mountain cabin with the
    snow falling outside. It would be a small family affair, close and warm,
    lit by firelight and candles. We would invite everyone for a holiday
    party and surprise them all with our nuptials He would cry as he vowed
    his love to me, thinking secretly that he never thought life could be
    this beautiful. I would look at him and know this is the person I'm
    going to he with forever That I never have to he alone again. Should it
    worry me that even in my fantasy, the man is getting married for love
    hut I just don't want to he alone anymore? I stop for coffee and meet
    Olivia on the steps of city ball at 10:30 am. She is wearing 1940s-style
    pants that button on the side. Her white-and-pink polka-dot top is
    fluttering in the wind of the morning; her tanned, flat stomach is
    visible with every other whispery breeze. Pasadena City Hall, built in
    1927, was fashioned in the style of sixteenth-century Italian architect
    Andrea Palladio. Using building materials such as Alaskan marble,
    vertical-grained
     
    65 Conversations with the Fat Girl 59
     
    white oak, Cordova clay tile for the roof, and fish-scale tile for I he
    massive dome, the city hail serves as a focal point for the en- lire
    city The gardens have a Spanish Colonial feel to them, but he eye is
    drawn to the huge cast-stone baroque fountain in the exact center.
    Around the garden, paths of crushed granite set .ipart flower beds
    bursting with hydrangeas, azaleas, and hundreds upon thousands of
    annuals that are rotated throughout ike year. Needless to say, it's not
    your average suburban city hall. ?She's late,? Olivia greets me. ?Ifs
    just now ten thirty I'm sure she's just finding parking somewhere.? I
    sip my coffee and look around at the empty parking lot. We smile at each
    other as my ridiculous statement hangs in the air. Olivia laughs and
    shoves me aside, regaining her composure. ?Are you meeting us at
    Martine's on Tuesday for the wedding dress? Badgley Mischka, can you
    believe it? This is my final fitting and I can't believe I've left it to
    the last minute. But I just couldn't, you know. I couldn't even think
    about walking down I lie aisle in anything but a size two, just this
    weekend I bought I his pair of jeans and the four was too big. I thought
    maybe maybe. I asked the girl to run get me a two. She did and it fit.
    You can't imagine how incredible it feels to look at the tag of a Piece
    of clothing you're wearing and see SIZE TWO Just staring right back at
    you. Girl, it's amazing. So I knew this week was it. I called Mommy
    right from the store and told her we were going o that last fitting as
    soon as I could catch a flight out.?I try to picture a size 2 tag
    staring up at me. That would be incredible, because I would probably
    have a tiny person stuck in the back f my pants, struggling to free
    herself. Olivia looks at me, as I am obviously a little speechless. I
    ever, not once, thought about getting gastric bypass. I know it
     
    66 60 LIza Palmer has worked for her, but I can't fathom such a last
    resort. Not that I'm doing any better. Doing nothing is certainly not
    something I'm comfortable with, either. ?I have Tuesday off work. We can
    do it then,?I say, sipping my coffee. A flash of recognition of her faux
    pas passes over Olivia. ?I'm sorry, Maggie. I know you're struggling,
    and I'm just over here rambling on about size twos and shit like that.
    Whatta bitch, huh? I'm sorry just please give me a little leeway right
    now, I think I'm going a little nuts, you know? All this wedding stuff.
    I just never thought it would be this big of a hassle. All of my clients
    are